How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it sure takes a shitload of light bulbs!
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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I bought some shoes off of a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with

but I've been trippin' all day.
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Went to the corner shop -

bought 4 corners.

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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks
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What happens when frogs park illegally?

They get toad.
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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Making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon
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