How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it sure takes a shitload of light bulbs!
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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How many referral agents does it take to change a light bulb?

Two: One to screw you out of a fee, and the other to send you to a store where they ran out of bulbs weeks ago.
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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How do you get a cello player to play in tune?

Tell him the key signature has 8 sharps.

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How many bikers does it take to change a light bulb?

It takes two. One to change the bulb, and the other to kick the switch.
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What is the difference between a fly and superman?

Superman can fly, but a fly cannot superman!
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What has a head but no body?

A nail.
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What's the definition of perfect pitch?

When you toss a banjo in the garbage and it hits an accordion.

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