How many graduate students does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it may take upwards of five years for him to get it done.
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What is King Arthur's favorite fish?

A swordfish
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I think I want a job cleaning mirrors.


It's something I could really see myself doing.
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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There's two fish in a tank, and one says "How do you drive this thing?"
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Why did the football coach go to the bank?

To get his quarterback.
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What is worse then having one baby screaming?

Two babies screaming!
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Two girls were born on the same day, same year, same parents, except they are not twins. Explain:

They are triplets.
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There were two cows in a paddock. One of the cows says, "moo"

and the other one says, "That's what I was going to say."
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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