How many graduate students does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it may take upwards of five years for him to get it done.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A blushing zebra.
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What has 6 eyes but can't see?

3 blind mice.
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I think I want a job cleaning mirrors.


It's something I could really see myself doing.
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How many charismatics does it take to change a light bulb?

Three - one to cast the bulb into the outer darkness, and two to catch it when it falls.
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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Middle C, E-Flat and G walk into a bar.

Sorry, says the barman, we don't serve minors.
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What did one cow say to the other?

Mooooooove over
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Customer: "Do you have alligator shoes?"

Clerk: "Yes, sir. What size does your alligator wear?"
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How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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