How many grips does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to hold it, one to hammer it in.
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Where does a polarbear keep its money?

In a snow bank!
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What's worse than a centipede with athlete's foot?

A porcupine with split ends
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How many Psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but the bulb has got to really WANT to change.
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Which reindeer likes to clean?

Comet
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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison
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Trump: "It's not a toupee,

I just found the Bush that Jeb lost."
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I wouldn't buy anything with velcro.

It's a total rip-off.
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