How many grips does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to hold it, one to hammer it in.
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What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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Why are there fences around a graveyard?

Because people are dying to get in!
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What do envelopes say when you lick them?

Nothing, it shuts them up!
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vampire?

A vampire only sucks blood at night.
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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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How many nuclear engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to install the new bulb and six to figure out what to do with the old one for the next 10,000 years.
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What kind of cats like to go bowling?

Alley cats.
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What do have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand?

Not enough sand.
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