How many grips does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to hold it, one to hammer it in.
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What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.
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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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Why can't you say a joke while standing on ice?

Because it might crack up!
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What did the baby corn ask the mother corn?

Where is pop corn?
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