How many grips does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to hold it, one to hammer it in.
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Went to the corner shop -

bought 4 corners.

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What happens when frogs park illegally?

They get toad.
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What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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What did one tooth say to the other tooth?

The dentist is taking me out tonight.
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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