How many grips does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to hold it, one to hammer it in.
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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And the mermaid, that was weird. What was she wearing in math class?

An Algae-bra
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How did Ben Franklin feel after discovering electricity?

Shocked.
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"I said to the Gym instructor "Can you teach me to do the splits?" He said, "How flexible are you?"

I said, "I can't make Tuesdays"

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What do moms dress up as on Halloween?

Mummies!
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What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?

Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to take notes while the other screws it into the faucet.
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Why did the cat go to Minnesota?

To get a mini soda
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