How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?

A brick layer!
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Earlier this year I saw The Theory of Everything – loved it.

Should've been called Look Who's Hawking, that's my only criticism.
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What letter can you drink?

T (tea)
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I'm on a whiskey diet.

I've lost three days already.

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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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What did the snowman say to the customer?

Have an ice day!
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How many anarchists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

All of them.
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How many engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

First they have to agree on which is better; the analog bulb or a digital bulb.
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