How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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What lies on its back, one hundred feet in the air?

A dead centipede.
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How many does it take to screw in a light bulb?

10. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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What do you call a slow skier?

A slopepoke!
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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?

Hope it's Halloween!!
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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper
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What does Donald Trump say when he can't find his Viagra?

"The erection is rigged!"
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