How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.

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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!

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Where did the sheep go on vacation?

The baaaahamas

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How many Wardrobe people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

"Nobody said I needed doubles on that!"

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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess

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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.

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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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What did the little girl say when she had to choose between a tricycle and a candy bar?

"Trike or Treat"?
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