How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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Two girls were born on the same day, same year, same parents, except they are not twins. Explain:

They are triplets.
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What did the ghost say to the other ghost?

Do you believe in humans?
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The oddly pleasant feeling of looking down on a physist as they drink the last of their beer.

The strange charm of a top down bottoms up.
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What's the difference between a piano and a tuna?

You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna

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How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away his credit card
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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Why did the tree get a computer?

To log on.
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What happens when you play "the blues" backwards?

Your wife comes back to you, your dog returns to life and you get out of prison.

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