How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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How does the ocean say hello?

It waves.
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What is up in the air and wobbles?

A jellycopter
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How many BBS jokers does it take to tell yet another LBJ?

1,622. One to tell the original joke, and the rest to submit give some minor variation of it! For example:
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What did one magnet say to the other?

I find you very attractive.
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How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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