How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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Why did the basketball player bring his suitcase to his game?

Because he traveled a lot.
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What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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What do you call a Disney Princess that supports Donald Trump?

Snow White Supremacist.
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So I met this gangster who pulls up the back of people's pants,

it was Wedgie Kray.

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