How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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Why were the teacher's eyes crossed?

She couldn't control her pupils.
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Why do seagulls fly over the sea?

Because if they flew over the bay, they'd be baygulls!
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Went to the corner shop -

bought 4 corners.

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Which search engine is popular amongst mice?

Ask Cheese.
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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?

It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.
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Why don't they know where Mozart is buried?

Because he's Haydn.

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