How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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What has legs but doesn't walk?

A bed.
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Humpty Trumpty wants a great wall.

Humpty Trumpty wants Mexico to pay for it all.
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My pastor, he ate too many beans.

He had in his own pews.
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What kind of pants do ghosts wear?

Boo-Jeans.
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There was a rooster sitting on a top of a barn. If it laid an egg, which way would it roll?

Roosters don't lay eggs!
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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