How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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Where do you go to find a million story building?

You go to the Library!
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Why do seagulls fly over the sea?

Because if they flew over the bay, they'd be baygulls!
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Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly. But when they lit a fire in the craft, it sank,

proving once and for all that you can't have your kayak and heat it.

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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog
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I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day.

Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair.

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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.
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