How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?

Because there was no atmosphere.
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Why did the football coach go to the bank?

To get his quarterback.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck

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What did Michael Jackson tell the little boy?

"The way you make me feel, it really turns me on!"
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What do you call a fake noodle?

An impasta
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How many Klingons does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two. One to screw it in, and one to stab the other in the back and take all the credit.


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How many Christian Scientists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None, but it takes at least one to sit and pray for the old one to go back on.

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How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.

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