How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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What cell phones do travelling nuns use?

Virgin mobile.
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What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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I think I want a job cleaning mirrors.


It's something I could really see myself doing.
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Why do hummingbirds hum?

Because they don't know the words.
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Why did the gardener plant his money?

He wanted his soil to be rich!
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