How many hardware engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Any changes will have to be implemented in software.
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What is the most important rule in chemistry?

Never lick the spoon!
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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Why did Mozart sell his chickens?

Because they kept saying "bach bach"!
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How many IBM engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just let Marketing explain that "Dead Bulb" is a feature.
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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Where does the snowman hide his money?

In the snow bank.
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How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change the bulb and three to whine "It's too high"
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How do you fix a broken Tuba.

With a tuba glue.
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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