How many hardware folks does it take to change a light bulb?

None. That's a software problem.
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Went to the corner shop -

bought 4 corners.

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How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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What did Delaware?

A New Jersey.
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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