How many hardware folks does it take to change a light bulb?

None. That's a software problem.
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What kind of shoes do bannanas make?

Slippers!
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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How does an Eskimo stick his house together?

With igloo!
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I bought some shoes off of a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with

but I've been trippin' all day.
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What is up in the air and wobbles?

A jellycopter
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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.
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When is a car not a car?

When it turns into a garage.
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How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

100: One to do it and ninety-nine to say "I could've done that."
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What kind of phones do people in jail use?

Cell phones
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