How many hardware folks does it take to change a light bulb?

None. That's a software problem.
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There was an explosion at a cheese factory in France...

all that was left was de brie.
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What happens when spectroscopists are idle?

They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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Why do ducks fly south?

Because it's too far to walk!
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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Why won't sharks attack lawyers?

Professional courtesy.
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What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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