How many hardware folks does it take to change a light bulb?

None. That's a software problem.
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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them
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How many Einsteins does it take to change a light bulb?

That depends on the speed of the change and the mass of the bulb. Or vice versa, of course. It just might be easier to leave the bulb and change the room. It's all relative.
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How do you know an elephant has been in your refrigerator?

There are footprints in the butter.
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What is the most important rule in chemistry?

Never lick the spoon!
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I'm on a whiskey diet.

I've lost three days already.

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Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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