How many Holocaust revisionists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None: they just deny that the bulb ever went out in the first place.
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Why did the orange stop in the middle of the hill?

It ran out of juice!
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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How does a pig go to hospital?

In a hambulance.
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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What kind of band can't play music?

A rubber band.
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Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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