How many IBM engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just let Marketing explain that "Dead Bulb" is a feature.
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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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What's brown and looks really good on a lawyer?

A Doberman.
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!" The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: "The driver just insulted me!"

The man says: "You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you."
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What's the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer?

One's a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.
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What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?

A brick layer!
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What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.
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How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb

Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got this neat candle holder...
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What's the only difference between Donald Trump and Bozo the Clown?

Bozo The Clown has real hair on his head.
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