How many IBM engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just let Marketing explain that "Dead Bulb" is a feature.
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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Whats the difference between a cat and a compound sentence?

One has claws at the end of its paws and one has a pause at the end of its clause
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How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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Who can hold up a bus with one hand?

A crossing guard.
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How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?

Squeaky clean
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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How many Marxists does it take to change a light bulb?

None. The light bulb contains the seeds of its own revolution.
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What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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