How many IBM engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just let Marketing explain that "Dead Bulb" is a feature.
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What has a lot of keys but can not open any doors?

A piano.
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Why don't mountains get cold in the winter?

They wear snowcaps.
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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies
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What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?

It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.
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What is a frog's favorite year?

Leap Year
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A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar.

The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"
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