How many IBM engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just let Marketing explain that "Dead Bulb" is a feature.
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Why can't a bicycle stand up?

Because it's two tired!
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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest.. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win.

Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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What has 4 wheels, gives milk, and eats grass.

A cow on a skateboard.
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What do you call a gorilla wearing earmuffs?

Anything you like, he can't hear you.
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What do you get if Bach falls off a horse but has the courage to get on again and continue riding?

Bach in the saddle again.

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How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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