How many IBM engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just let Marketing explain that "Dead Bulb" is a feature.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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What's a tree's favorite drink?

Rootbeer.
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What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.
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Why did the drum take a nap?

It was beat.
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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Where do ghosts buy their food?

At the ghost-ery store!
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Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Snow.
Snow who?

Snowbody!
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Why don't mountains get cold in the winter?

They wear snowcaps.
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