How many IBM engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just let Marketing explain that "Dead Bulb" is a feature.

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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Well, first let's talk about the concept behind this whole "light bulb" thing.

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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.

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How does a pig go to hospital?

In a hambulance.

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What do you call a lawyer gone bad.

Senator.
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.

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Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit

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