How many IBM engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just let Marketing explain that "Dead Bulb" is a feature.
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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What do planets like to read?

Comet books!
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Can you use pink,yellow and green in a sentence?

. The phone went green green, and I pinked it up and said yellow.
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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How many light bulbs does it take to change a light bulb?

One, if it knows its own Goedel number.
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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What is a baby's motto?

If at first you don't succeed, cry and cry again!
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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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What do aliens on the metric system say?

Take me to your liter.
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