How many IBM engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just let Marketing explain that "Dead Bulb" is a feature.
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Why did Bach have so many children?

He did not have a stop on his organ.

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How do you make a cello sound beautiful?

Sell it and buy a violin

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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"

The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?

Their lips are moving.
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What do Russians use for napkins?

Soviets
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