How many IBM engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just let Marketing explain that "Dead Bulb" is a feature.
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Why can't a bicycle stand up?

Because it's two tired!
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Why did they kick cinderella off the baseball team?

She kept running away from the ball.
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Why is slippery ice like music?

If you don't C sharp - you'll B flat!

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Which reindeer likes to clean?

Comet
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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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What is a ghost's favorite fruit?

Booberries!
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Why did the cat go to Minnesota?

To get a mini soda
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Trump: "It's not a toupee,

I just found the Bush that Jeb lost."
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.
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