How many IBM engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just let Marketing explain that "Dead Bulb" is a feature.
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Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?

Because there was no atmosphere.
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How many teenage girls does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One, but she'll be on the phone for five hours telling all her friends about it.
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What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy
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If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?

It might be your bicycle.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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How is Donald Trump going to create middle class jobs?

By paying them to cheer for him during campaign events.
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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What's the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan?

If Trump gets Alzheimers his IQ will go up.
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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