How many IBM engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just let Marketing explain that "Dead Bulb" is a feature.
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What do planets like to read?

Comet books!
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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How many managers does it take to change a light bulb?

Nearly unanswerable, since the one who tries to change it usually drops it, and the others call for a planning session.
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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What is the best thing to do if you find a gorilla in your bed?

Sleep somewhere else.
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