How many IBM engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just let Marketing explain that "Dead Bulb" is a feature.
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How do you make a cello sound beautiful?

Sell it and buy a violin

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What do you get when you plant a frog?

A cr-oak tree.
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What kind of potato chips fly?

Plane ones.
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What does a calf become after it's 1 year old?

2 years old.

Cow: "Mooooove over"
Sheep: "Naaaaaaa."
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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What did Michael Jackson say to Woody Allen?

Got two fives for a ten?
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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Why did the rooster cross the road?

To prove he wasn't a chicken!
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Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon?

He took them to a pignic.
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