How many IBM engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just let Marketing explain that "Dead Bulb" is a feature.
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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What do you call a cow that's just given birth?

[De-Calf-Inated]
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A small piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner. "Oh Bunsen, my flame," the sodium pined. "I melt whenever I see you,"

The Bunsen burner replied, "It's just a phase you're going through."
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What's the slipperiest country?

Greece!
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What is Donald Trump "really" trying to do?

Make America Hate Again.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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Customer: "Do you have alligator shoes?"

Clerk: "Yes, sir. What size does your alligator wear?"
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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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