How many IBM engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just let Marketing explain that "Dead Bulb" is a feature.
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Why didn't the girl take the bus home?

Because her mom would make her take it back.
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What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy
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Interesting story, the guy who helped me learn algebra never farted around anyone.

I mean he did say he was a private tutor.
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What do you call a smiling, sober, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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Why did the surfer think the sea was his friend?

Because it gave him a big wave!
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What is King Arthur's favorite fish?

A swordfish
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How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?

Their lips are moving.
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What happened when 500 hares got loose on Main Street?

The police had to comb the area.
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What kind of math do Snowy Owls like?

Owlgebra
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