How many IBM PC owners does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but she/he'll have to go out and buy the light bulb adaptor card first, which is extra.
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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies
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If you don't know what introspection is,

you need to take a long, hard look at yourself.
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What is on the ground and also a hundred feet in the air?

A centipede on its back!
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A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"

The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
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How do you get a cello player to play in tune?

Tell him the key signature has 8 sharps.

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Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.
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Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.
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Went to the corner shop -

bought 4 corners.

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