How many investment brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes.
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How many hardware engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Any changes will have to be implemented in software.
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What do an accordion and a lawsuit have in common?

Everyone is relieved when the case is closed.

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What happens when spectroscopists are idle?

They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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How many Feminists does it take to change a light bulb?

That's not funny!!!
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What is the best time to go to the dentist?

Tooth-hurty.
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Went to the corner shop -

bought 4 corners.

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What has four legs, a trunk, and sunglasses?

A mouse on vacation.
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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Why did the cat go to Minnesota?

To get a mini soda
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