How many investment brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes.
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What is a cat's favorite breakfast?

Mice krispies
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When can't you see a cheese?

When it's pasteurised...
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How many UNIX hacks does it take to change a light bulb?

As many as you want; they're all virtual anyway.
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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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Why can't Donald Trump be a Lannister?

Because he never pays his debts.
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What kind of shoes do bannanas make?

Slippers!
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What did Michael Jackson tell the little boy?

"The way you make me feel, it really turns me on!"
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Where did the music teacher leave her keys?

In the piano!

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How does a train sneeze?

Ah-choo-choo!
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