How many investment brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes.
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Why did Mozart sell his chickens?

Because they kept saying "bach bach"!
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.
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Why can't Donald Trump be a Lannister?

Because he never pays his debts.
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How do you know Donald Trump is talking to you?

Cause your the only one Hair.
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Can you use pink,yellow and green in a sentence?

. The phone went green green, and I pinked it up and said yellow.
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Why did the orange stop in the middle of the hill?

It ran out of juice!
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What's the difference between a musician and a 14-inch pizza?

A 14-inch pizza can feed a family of four

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