How many investment brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes.
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

Many hands make light work.
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What has four wheels and flies?

A garbage truck.
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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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What is the best thing to do if you find a gorilla in your bed?

Sleep somewhere else.
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

You crack me up!
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What do you give a sick bird?

Tweetment.
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