How many investment brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes.
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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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How do locomotives hear?

Through the engineers.
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Dorian Gray Jokes,

they never get old!
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Why did the oreo go to the dentist?

To get his filling!
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What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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What is a tree's favorite drink?

Root beer.
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What do Santa's elves drink?

Minnesoda.
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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