How many investment brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes.
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What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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When can't you see a cheese?

When it's pasteurised...
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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Why does Donald Trump prefer E.T. to illegal immigrants?

Because E.T. eventually went home!
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How many BBS jokers does it take to tell yet another LBJ?

1,622. One to tell the original joke, and the rest to submit give some minor variation of it! For example:
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What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile
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How do they serve smart hamburgers?

On honor rolls.
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How do you stop a dog barking in the back seat of a car?

Put him in the front seat.
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