How many investment brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes.
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Humpty Trumpty wants a great wall.

Humpty Trumpty wants Mexico to pay for it all.
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When are kids most likely to go to school?

When the door is open.
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How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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What is a snowman's favorite breakfast?

Frosted Flakes!
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day

but I couldn't find any.

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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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