How many investment brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes.
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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How many UNIX hacks does it take to change a light bulb?

As many as you want; they're all virtual anyway.
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What's the only difference between Donald Trump and Bozo the Clown?

Bozo The Clown has real hair on his head.
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Two girls were born on the same day, same year, same parents, except they are not twins. Explain:

They are triplets.
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.
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When should you buy a bird?

When it's going cheep!

Did you hear the one about the crow and the telephone pole?
He wanted to make a long distance caw.
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Name four men that are in a rock group together but none of them sing nor play music...

Mt Rushmore. They're a rock group.. it's a rock...group
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He made an illegal ewe turn.
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