How many Iraqis does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It doesn't matter, they don't have any electricity any more.
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Why did the bird get a ticket?

It broke the law of gravity!
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What do you call a parrot that flew away?

A polygon
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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Who can hold up a bus with one hand?

A crossing guard.
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Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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How many radical feminists does it take to change a light bulb?

That isn't funny!
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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What day of the week tastes the best?

Sunday!
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