How many Iraqis does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It doesn't matter, they don't have any electricity any more.
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When is a door not a door?

When it's ajar!
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What is the difference between a lawyer and a rooster?

When a rooster wakes up in the morning, its primal urge is to cluck defiance.
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How many dull people does it take to change a light bulb?

One.
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My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well,

I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

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Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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I went to the doctors the other day and I said, 'Have you got anything for wind?'

So he gave me a kite.

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How many Bratzlaver Chassidim does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They will never find one that burned as brightly as the first one.
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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