How many Iraqis does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It doesn't matter, they don't have any electricity any more.
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Now that Macy's has severed ties, with Donald Trump, how can the average American look like the President?

By hunting and killing their own hair piece.
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What is Donald Trumps campaign slogan?

"A complex world demands complex hair."
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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How do you get a cello player to play in tune?

Tell him the key signature has 8 sharps.

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Trump: "It's not a toupee,

I just found the Bush that Jeb lost."
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Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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What is the snake's favorite subject?

Hiss-story
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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