How many Iraqis does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It doesn't matter, they don't have any electricity any more.
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Why didn't the girl take the bus home?

Because her mom would make her take it back.
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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Why was the mouse afraid of the water?

Catfish
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What bird can lift the most?

A crane.
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What did the one penny say to the other penny?

We make perfect cents.
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The other day I sent my girlfriend a huge pile of snow.

I rang her up, I said "Did you get my drift?".
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

He got caught peeping on a test.
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Trump: "It's not a toupee,

I just found the Bush that Jeb lost."
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What does Santa like to do in the garden?

Hoe, hoe, hoe!
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