How many Iraqis does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It doesn't matter, they don't have any electricity any more.
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How many UFO buffs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. You don't believe me do you? I've got photos! See that big blob? Well, just squint your eyes a bit. . . .
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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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What did one hair say to the other?

It takes two to tangle!
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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The defendant is accused of putting dynamite into a steer.

Abominable! [A Bomb In a Bull]
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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What is a tornado's favorite game?

Twister!
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