How many Iraqis does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It doesn't matter, they don't have any electricity any more.
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I said to this train driver "I want to go to Paris". He said "Eurostar?"

I said, "I've been on telly but I'm no Dean Martin".
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Where does the snowman hide his money?

In the snow bank.
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.
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What did the laywer name his daughter?

Sue.
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What does cheese say to itself in the mirror?

Halloumi.
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Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, "AU, get outta here!"
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Why did the baseball player bring a rope to the game?

Because he wanted to tie the score!
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