How many Iraqis does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It doesn't matter, they don't have any electricity any more.
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Why are there fences around a graveyard?

Because people are dying to get in!
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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Why do some people have an instant aversion to banjo players?

It saves time in the long run.

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Why did the surfer think the sea was his friend?

Because it gave him a big wave!
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