How many Iraqis does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It doesn't matter, they don't have any electricity any more.
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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What did one owl say to the other owl?

Happy Owl-ween!
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How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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What do you call a gorilla wearing earmuffs?

Anything you like, he can't hear you.
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A seal walks into a club...
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If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?

It might be your bicycle.
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Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.
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A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why?" they asked, as they moved off.

"because," he said "I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."
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