How many Iraqis does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It doesn't matter, they don't have any electricity any more.
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What do you call a dinosaur that smashes everything in its path?

Tyrannosaurus wrecks.
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Helium walks into a bar,
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."

Helium doesn't react.
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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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Why did the carpenter fall asleep on the job?

He was board.
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Which candles burn longer, bee's wax or tallow?

Neither, they all burn shorter.
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How many does it take to screw in a light bulb?

10. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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Who makes dinosaur clothes?

A dino-sewer.
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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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