How many Jewish renewal rabbis does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends. One, if it's an eco-kosher bulb that isn't going to be lit by electricity generated from nuclear power. Two, as long as a man and a woman rabbi have equal turns putting in the bulb. Three, one to change it, one to do a Buddhist mindfulness practice during the change, and one to document the paradigm shift in a best-selling book called The Jew in the Lightbulb. Four, same as above plus an additional rabbi to study the psycho-halachic implications of such a change and then lead a retreat weekend on the experience.
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Why doesn't Melania Trump want to be the first lady?

Because she would have to move into a smaller house.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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Why was the sand wet?

Because the sea weed
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What is King Arthur's favorite fish?

A swordfish
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What do camels use to hide themselves?

Camelflauge
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What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?

A Flat Major

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How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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How many conservatives does it take to change a light bulb?

One; after reflecting in the twilight on the merit of the previous bulb.
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What is the snake's favorite subject?

Hiss-story
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