How many Jewish renewal rabbis does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends. One, if it's an eco-kosher bulb that isn't going to be lit by electricity generated from nuclear power. Two, as long as a man and a woman rabbi have equal turns putting in the bulb. Three, one to change it, one to do a Buddhist mindfulness practice during the change, and one to document the paradigm shift in a best-selling book called The Jew in the Lightbulb. Four, same as above plus an additional rabbi to study the psycho-halachic implications of such a change and then lead a retreat weekend on the experience.
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop
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What can you hold without ever touching it?

A conversation.
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What is the chemical formula for "banana"?

BaNa2
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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What kind of cats like to go bowling?

Alley cats.
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How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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