How many Jewish renewal rabbis does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends. One, if it's an eco-kosher bulb that isn't going to be lit by electricity generated from nuclear power. Two, as long as a man and a woman rabbi have equal turns putting in the bulb. Three, one to change it, one to do a Buddhist mindfulness practice during the change, and one to document the paradigm shift in a best-selling book called The Jew in the Lightbulb. Four, same as above plus an additional rabbi to study the psycho-halachic implications of such a change and then lead a retreat weekend on the experience.
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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How many `Real Women' does it take to change a light bulb?

None: A `Real Woman' would have plenty of real men around to do it.
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Why did the skeleton cross the road?

To get to the body shop.
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What's the difference between a mosquito and a lawyer?

One is a blood-sucking parasite, the other is an insect.
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What do you get when you cross a witch with sand?

A sandwich!
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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