How many Jewish renewal rabbis does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends. One, if it's an eco-kosher bulb that isn't going to be lit by electricity generated from nuclear power. Two, as long as a man and a woman rabbi have equal turns putting in the bulb. Three, one to change it, one to do a Buddhist mindfulness practice during the change, and one to document the paradigm shift in a best-selling book called The Jew in the Lightbulb. Four, same as above plus an additional rabbi to study the psycho-halachic implications of such a change and then lead a retreat weekend on the experience.
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What kind of flower has lips?

Two-lips!
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What does cheese say to itself in the mirror?

Halloumi.
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And the mermaid, that was weird. What was she wearing in math class?

An Algae-bra
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Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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Why did the chicken cross the clothing store?

To get to the other size!
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I just watched a debate as to which cartoons were better- Disney or Warner Bros.

I have to say it got very animated.
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What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer?

An offer you can't understand
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Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras
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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.
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