How many Jewish renewal rabbis does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends. One, if it's an eco-kosher bulb that isn't going to be lit by electricity generated from nuclear power. Two, as long as a man and a woman rabbi have equal turns putting in the bulb. Three, one to change it, one to do a Buddhist mindfulness practice during the change, and one to document the paradigm shift in a best-selling book called The Jew in the Lightbulb. Four, same as above plus an additional rabbi to study the psycho-halachic implications of such a change and then lead a retreat weekend on the experience.
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How many Yuppies (WASPs) does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call the electrician, and one to mix the drinks.
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What kind of cats like to go bowling?

Alley cats.
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Ah, I had a great boomerang joke...

It'll come back to me.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.
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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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What do vampires take when they are sick?

Coffin drops!
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.
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