How many Jewish renewal rabbis does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends. One, if it's an eco-kosher bulb that isn't going to be lit by electricity generated from nuclear power. Two, as long as a man and a woman rabbi have equal turns putting in the bulb. Three, one to change it, one to do a Buddhist mindfulness practice during the change, and one to document the paradigm shift in a best-selling book called The Jew in the Lightbulb. Four, same as above plus an additional rabbi to study the psycho-halachic implications of such a change and then lead a retreat weekend on the experience.
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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Why do pandas like old movies?

Because they are black and white.
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Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia?

Because it's pretty basic stuff.
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How many archaeologists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One team, but they'll label every piece of the old one, mark its location in the room, and write a detailed description before determining that it was used to store cornmeal.
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What is the most important rule in chemistry?

Never lick the spoon!
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What does cheese like to drink?

Morbier
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How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
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Where do ghosts buy their food?

At the ghost-ery store!
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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