How many Jewish renewal rabbis does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends. One, if it's an eco-kosher bulb that isn't going to be lit by electricity generated from nuclear power. Two, as long as a man and a woman rabbi have equal turns putting in the bulb. Three, one to change it, one to do a Buddhist mindfulness practice during the change, and one to document the paradigm shift in a best-selling book called The Jew in the Lightbulb. Four, same as above plus an additional rabbi to study the psycho-halachic implications of such a change and then lead a retreat weekend on the experience.
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Why did the spy stay in bed?

Because he was under cover.
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How many dadaists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

To get to the other side.
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What's a light-year?

The same as a regular year, but with less calories.
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How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
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Who makes dinosaur clothes?

A dino-sewer.
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.
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