How many Jewish renewal rabbis does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends. One, if it's an eco-kosher bulb that isn't going to be lit by electricity generated from nuclear power. Two, as long as a man and a woman rabbi have equal turns putting in the bulb. Three, one to change it, one to do a Buddhist mindfulness practice during the change, and one to document the paradigm shift in a best-selling book called The Jew in the Lightbulb. Four, same as above plus an additional rabbi to study the psycho-halachic implications of such a change and then lead a retreat weekend on the experience.
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How does Donald Trump intend to spice up the Republican Convention?

By relocating it to a casino!
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Where would an astronaut park his space ship?

A parking meteor!
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When can't you see a cheese?

When it's pasteurised...
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Why does Donald Trump prefer E.T. to illegal immigrants?

Because E.T. eventually went home!
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What do Russians use for napkins?

Soviets
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How many agnostics does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Agnostics question whether electricity really exists.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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If you drop a white hat into the Red Sea, what does it become?

Wet.
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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