How many junkies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

``Oh wow, is it like dark, man?''

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How many sound engineers does it take to change a light bulb

None, sound engineers don't do lights

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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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Helium walks into a bar,
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."

Helium doesn't react.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.

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How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it sure takes a shitload of light bulbs!

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How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change the bulb and three to whine "It's too high"

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How did the bubble gum cross the road?

On the bottom of the chicken's foot!

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What did one cow say to the other?

Mooooooove over

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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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