How many junkies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

``Oh wow, is it like dark, man?''
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Where do fortune tellers dance?

At the crystal ball.
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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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How much does a hipster weigh?

An instagram.
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Why is the French horn the most divine instrument?

Man blows into it, but God only knows what comes out

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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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What do camels use to hide themselves?

Camelflauge
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How do Eskimos make their beds?

With sheets of ice and blankets of snow.
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How many dadaists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

To get to the other side.
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