How many junkies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

``Oh wow, is it like dark, man?''
Canvas not available.

or


What's the difference between a lawyer and God?

God doesn't think he's a lawyer.
Canvas not available.

or


I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah;

I thought, "He's trying to pull a fast one".

Canvas not available.

or


What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
Canvas not available.

or


What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.
Canvas not available.

or


What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
Canvas not available.

or


What do you call a cow that's just given birth?

[De-Calf-Inated]
Canvas not available.

or


If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?

It might be your bicycle.
Canvas not available.

or


Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
Canvas not available.

or


So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds".

I said, "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".
Canvas not available.

or






© Copyright crapjoke.com 2017-2025