How many junkies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

``Oh wow, is it like dark, man?''
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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What does a calf become after it's 1 year old?

2 years old.

Cow: "Mooooove over"
Sheep: "Naaaaaaa."
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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What goes up and down but never moves?

Stairs.
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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What creature is smarter than a talking parrot?

A spelling bee!
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