How many junkies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

``Oh wow, is it like dark, man?''
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He was a baaaaaaaaad driver.
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How do you make Halloween great again?

By carving a Trumpkin.
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What is the difference between a clarinet and an onion?

Nobody cries when you chop an clarinet into little pieces

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My pastor, he ate too many beans.

He had in his own pews.
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What did the clock do after it ate?

It went back four seconds!
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So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds".

I said, "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".
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Doc, I can't stop singing the 'Green Green Grass of Home'. He said: 'That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome'. 'Is it common?'I asked.

'It's not unusual' he replied.

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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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Where does Dorian Gray shop?

Forever 21
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