How many junkies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

``Oh wow, is it like dark, man?''
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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"I said to the Gym instructor "Can you teach me to do the splits?" He said, "How flexible are you?"

I said, "I can't make Tuesdays"

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What do you call a gorilla wearing earmuffs?

Anything you like, he can't hear you.
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How many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three, One to climb the ladder. One to shake it. And one to sue the ladder company.
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How do you make Halloween great again?

By carving a Trumpkin.
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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!
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How does a train sneeze?

Ah-choo-choo!
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How did the bubble gum cross the road?

On the bottom of the chicken's foot!
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