How many junkies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

``Oh wow, is it like dark, man?''
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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Why are the middle ages sometimes called the Dark Ages?

Because they had so many knights.
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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Where do soldiers keep their armies?

In their Sleevies!
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar.

The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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What do you call a fat pumpkin?

A plumpkin.
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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