How many junkies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

``Oh wow, is it like dark, man?''
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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What's worse than a centipede with athlete's foot?

A porcupine with split ends
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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What does Santa like to do in the garden?

Hoe, hoe, hoe!
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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What did the Donald tell an illegal immigrant who was trying to put out a fire at Trump Tower?

No way Hose A.
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What is only a small box but can weigh over a hundred pounds?

A scale.
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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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