How many junkies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

``Oh wow, is it like dark, man?''
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What do you call a song sung in an automobile?

A cartoon.
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How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks.

They charged one - and let the other one off.

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Why don't lawyers go to the beach?

Cats keep trying to bury them.
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How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.
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What did the baby corn ask the mother corn?

Where is pop corn?
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What is a snowman's favorite breakfast?

Frosted Flakes!
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Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys?

He was playing by ear

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