How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Hell, you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.
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A jump-lead walks into a bar.

The barman says "I'll serve you, but don't start anything"
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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison
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What did Tennessee?

The same thing Arkansas.
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What did the peanut say to the walnut?

Nothing. Nuts can't talk.
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Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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What goes on and on and has an i in the middle?

An onion
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What do Santa's elves drive?

Minivans.
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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What did the class clown take a computer to school?

Her mom told her to bring in an apple for the teacher.
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