How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Hell, you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.
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How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it sure takes a shitload of light bulbs!
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What's a puppy's favorite kind of pizza?

Pupperoni.
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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.
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What do you call a smiling, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None 'o yo' fuckin' business!
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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How many junkies does it take to change a light bulb?

Oh wow, is it, like, dark, man?
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What's the tallest building in the world?

The library, because it has the most stories.
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