How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Hell, you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.
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What does the winner of the race lose?

His breath.
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What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?

Because he had no BODY to go with.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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How many French Horn players does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he/she will spend hours checking for technical problems.
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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Helium walks into a bar,
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."

Helium doesn't react.
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What did rural America tell Donald Trump?

You're Hired.
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Why do pandas like old movies?

Because they are black and white.
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