How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Hell, you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

You crack me up!
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What goes 99 thump,99 thump,99 thump?

A centipede with a wooden leg.
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How many ``pro-lifers'' does it take to change a light bulb?

6: 2 to screw in the bulb and 4 to testify that it was lit from the moment they began screwing.
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?

Squeaky clean
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Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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