How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Hell, you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.
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What airline does Donald Trump aspire to fly?

Hair Force One!
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When do you go on red and stop on green?

When you are eating a watermelon.
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What do you call a sad bird?

A bluebird!
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What do Santa's elves drive?

Minivans.
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What has four legs, a trunk, and sunglasses?

A mouse on vacation.
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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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