How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Hell, you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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What's the one thing that never works when it's fixed?

A jury.
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Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!
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What did the porcupine say to the cactus?

Is that you mommy?
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How many mystery writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two — one to screw it most of the way in and the other to give it a surprise twist at the end.
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Why did the boy take a ladder to school?

He wanted to go to high school!
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Clowns divorce:

custardy battle.
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What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.
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Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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