How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Hell, you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.
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Why does Trump love the poorly educated?

Because they only know their ABCs "Anybody But Clinton".
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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What is the most important rule in chemistry?

Never lick the spoon!
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How do dinosaurs pay their bills?

With Tyrannosaurus checks.
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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How many Klingons does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two. One to screw it in, and one to stab the other in the back and take all the credit.
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What is a cheetahs favorite food?

Fast food

A team of little animals and a team of big animals decided to play football. During the first half of the game, the big animals were winning. But during the second half,a centipede scored so many touchdowns that the little animals won the game. When the game was over, the chipmunk asked the centipede, "Where were you during the first half?" He replied "Putting on my shoes".
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Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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