How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Hell, you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.
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What breakfast cereal does Frosty the Snowman eat?

Snowflakes.
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Where does the snowman hide his money?

In the snow bank.
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How many shaggy dogs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Fewer than it takes to screw in a heavy bulb.
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog
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What do you call a boomerang that won't come back?

A stick.
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What do you get when you plant a frog?

A cr-oak tree.
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A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself.

The blonde responds to the husband, "Shut up...you're next!"
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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Why are elephants wrinkled?

Because they don't fit on a ironing board
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