How many lawyer jokes are there?

Only three. The rest are true stories.
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What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.
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I think I want a job cleaning mirrors.


It's something I could really see myself doing.
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Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon?

Great food, no atmosphere.
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to take notes while the other screws it into the faucet.
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How many supporters of George W. Bush does it take to change a light bulb?

None. First, denounce the nearest Democrats as liberal pantywaists who deliberately caused the bulb to blow. Second, announce that the Bush administration has proved that the science of electricity is faulty, so no action ever needs to be taken on global light change. Third, keep the need for a new light bulb strictly secret. Fourth, use the money for new light bulbs as an excuse for another tax cut for Bush's wealthy friends. Fifth, explain that you would never "disassemble" about the need for light, you are way too busy spreading freedom and democracy in the Middle East by eliminating freedom and democracy in the United States.
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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How do you get a lawyer out of a tree?

Cut the rope.
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