How many lawyer jokes are there?

Only three. The rest are true stories.
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What do you call a cow with three legs?

Lean beef.
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What do you call a dinosaur that smashes everything in its path?

Tyrannosaurus wrecks.
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What is black and white and red all over?

A skunk with a rash.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and God?

God doesn't think he's a lawyer.
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin'!
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Why did Mozart sell his chickens?

Because they kept saying "bach bach"!
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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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What kind of underwear to reporters wear?

News briefs.
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