How many lawyer jokes are there?

Only three. The rest are true stories.
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There were five people under one umbrella. Why didn't they get wet?

It wasn't raining!
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What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.
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What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?

As far away as possible.
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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What did the banana do when the monkey chased it?

The banana split
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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What is a ghost's favorite fruit?

Booberries!
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly. But when they lit a fire in the craft, it sank,

proving once and for all that you can't have your kayak and heat it.

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