How many lawyer jokes are there?

Only three. The rest are true stories.
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What do planets like to read?

Comet books!
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How many board meetings does it take to get a light bulb changed?

This topic was resumed from last week's discussion, but is incomplete pending resolution of some action items. It will be continued next week. Meanwhile . . .
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Well, first let's talk about the concept behind this whole "light bulb" thing.
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Where do you go to find a million story building?

You go to the Library!
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.

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What do you call a rabbit with beetles all over it?

Bugs Bunny.
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why?" they asked, as they moved off.

"because," he said "I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."
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