How many lawyer jokes are there?

Only three. The rest are true stories.
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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."

The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?

A Flat Major

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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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When are kids most likely to go to school?

When the door is open.
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How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.
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