How many lawyer jokes are there?

Only three. The rest are true stories.
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What do Santa's elves drink?

Minnesoda.
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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How do you make a cello sound beautiful?

Sell it and buy a violin

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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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Why did the football coach go to the bank?

To get his quarterback.
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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