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How many lawyer jokes are there?
Only three. The rest are true stories.
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What music does cheese listen to?
R & Brie.
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What day of the week tastes the best?
Sunday!
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Went to the paper shop -
it had blown away.
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What is worse then having one baby screaming?
Two babies screaming!
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Why does Trump love the poorly educated?
Because they only know their ABCs "Anybody But Clinton".
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?
Saint Nickel-less.
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Why do cows wear bells?
Because their horns don't work.
There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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What has a bed that you can't sleep in?
A river.
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How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?
All of them
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