How many lawyer jokes are there?

Only three. The rest are true stories.
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I went down the local supermarket, I said, "I want to make a complaint, this vinegar's got lumps in it",

he said, "Those are pickled onions".

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What two things can you not have for breakfast?

Lunch and dinner.
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What happens when frogs park illegally?

They get toad.
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I’ve never gone to a gun range before.

I decided to give it a shot!
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon!
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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Why did the news reporter go to the ice cream parlor?

Because she wanted to get a good scoop.
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What did the picture say to the wall?

I've been framed!
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