How many lawyer jokes are there?

Only three. The rest are true stories.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon

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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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What kind of phones do people in jail use?

Cell phones
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Why did the drum take a nap?

It was beat.
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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."

The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.

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Why didn't the rooster cross the road?

Because it was chicken.

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What airline does Donald Trump aspire to fly?

Hair Force One!
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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