How many lawyer jokes are there?

Only three. The rest are true stories.
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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?

Holly Davidson.
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What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

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What do you call a loony spaceman?

An astronut.
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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How many polite New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Both of them.

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When do you go on red and stop on green?

When you are eating a watermelon.
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If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice?

H2O cubed.
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.

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