How many lawyer jokes are there?

Only three. The rest are true stories.
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How do you know when the moon has enough to eat?

When it's full.
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What's an alligator's favorite drink?

Gator-Ade.
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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How do you handle dangerous cheese?

Caerphilly.
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If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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I swear, the other day I bought a packet of peanuts, and on the packet it said "may contain nuts." Well, YES! That's what I bought the buggers for!

You'd be annoyed if you opened it and a socket set fell out!"

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