How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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Why don't they know where Mozart is buried?

Because he's Haydn.

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Why are kindergarten teachers so good?

They can make little things count.
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What is a frog's favorite year?

Leap Year
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How does Donald Trump intend to spice up the Republican Convention?

By relocating it to a casino!
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So I met this gangster who pulls up the back of people's pants,

it was Wedgie Kray.

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What happened when 500 hares got loose on Main Street?

The police had to comb the area.
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What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.
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What's the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer?

One's a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.
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