How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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How do crows stick together in a flock?

Velcrow.
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Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?

Because there was no atmosphere.
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What do you call the best butter on the farm?

A goat.
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A lorry-load of tortoises crashed into a trainload of terrapins,

What a turtle disaster

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What did the one penny say to the other penny?

We make perfect cents.
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What is at the end of everything?

The letter G.
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What do you call two ants that run away to get married?

Ant-elopes!
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A seal walks into a club...
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