How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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What do you call cheese that isn't yours?

Nacho cheese.
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 100?
Your Honor.
What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 50

Senator.
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What do Santa's elves drink?

Minnesoda.
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What kind of pants do ghosts wear?

Boo-Jeans.
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