How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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How do you open the great lakes?

With the Florida Keys.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a trampoline?

You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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I just watched a debate as to which cartoons were better- Disney or Warner Bros.

I have to say it got very animated.
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What did Delaware?

A New Jersey.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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