How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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What is Donald Trump "really" trying to do?

Make America Hate Again.
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What is a cat's favorite breakfast?

Mice krispies
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper
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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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How are an apple and a lawyer alike?

They both look good hanging from a tree.
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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