How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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What clothes does a house wear?

Address.
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What do you call a 400-pound gorilla?

Sir.
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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What did Tennessee?
The same thing Arkansas.
What did Delaware?

Her New Jersey.
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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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How many charismatics does it take to change a light bulb?

Three - one to cast the bulb into the outer darkness, and two to catch it when it falls.
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What do you call a gorilla wearing earmuffs?

Anything you like, he can't hear you.
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What's the difference between a good lawyer and a bad lawyer?

A bad lawyer makes your case drag on for years. A good lawyer makes it last even longer.
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