How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.

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What did rural America tell Donald Trump?

You're Hired.
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Why did the drum take a nap?

It was beat.
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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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How many engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

First they have to agree on which is better; the analog bulb or a digital bulb.

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What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.
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What did the picture say to the wall?

I've got you covered!
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