How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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What do frogs order when they go to a restaurant?

French Flies.
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Why did the thief take a shower?

He wanted to make a clean getaway!
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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What has a head but no body?

A nail.
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What does the winner of the race lose?

His breath.
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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Why don't honest people need beds?

They don't lie.
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What lies on its back, one hundred feet in the air?

A dead centipede.
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