How many lesbians does it take to change a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and two to talk about how much better it is than with a man.
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How do you make an egg laugh?

Tell it a yolk.
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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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How many record producers does it take to change a lightbulb?

Two… one to tell the engineer to do it, the other to say "I don't know, what do you think?"

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How many lawyer jokes are there?

Only three. The rest are true stories.
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Hell, you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.
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A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then

*poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
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How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit
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