How many lesbians does it take to change a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and two to talk about how much better it is than with a man.
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When Susan's boyfriend proposed marriage to her she said: "I love the simple things in life,

but I don't want one of them for my husband".

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How many anarchists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

All of them.
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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What do you call the security guards outside of Samsung.

The guardians of the galaxy!
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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.
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Where do soldiers keep their armies?

In their Sleevies!
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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How many bikers does it take to change a light bulb?

It takes two. One to change the bulb, and the other to kick the switch.
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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