How many lesbians does it take to change a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and two to talk about how much better it is than with a man.
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What two things can you not have for breakfast?

Lunch and dinner.
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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Why do loud, obnoxious whistles exist at some factories?

To give us some sort of appreciation for flutes.

Did you hear about that music composer who committed suicide? He didn't even leave a note.

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What did the drummer get on his I.Q. Test?

Saliva
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What's 182 feet tall and made out of pepperoni and cheese?

The leaning tower of Pizza.
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What has four legs but never stands?

A Chair!
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What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.
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Humpty Trumpty wants a great wall.

Humpty Trumpty wants Mexico to pay for it all.
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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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