How many lesbians does it take to change a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and two to talk about how much better it is than with a man.
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Why did the boy take a ruler to bed?

To see how long he slept.
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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How many U.S. Marines does it take to change a light bulb?

Fifty — one to screw in the bulb and 49 to guard him/her.
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.
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Where would an astronaut park his space ship?

A parking meteor!
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If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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Why did the rooster cross the road?

To prove he wasn't a chicken!
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