How many lesbians does it take to change a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and two to talk about how much better it is than with a man.
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What has 4 wheels, gives milk, and eats grass.

A cow on a skateboard.
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Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Snow.
Snow who?

Snowbody!
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What do you call a snowman in the desert?

A puddle!
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Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station.
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So I was on a train with Einstein and he turns to me and asks...

Does Boston stop at this train?
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I'll tell you what I love doing more than anything: trying to pack myself in a small suitcase.

I can hardly contain myself.

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What did Michael Jackson say to Woody Allen?

Got two fives for a ten?
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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