How many lesbians does it take to change a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and two to talk about how much better it is than with a man.
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What is the definition of a shame (as in "that's a shame")?

When a busload of lawyers goes off a cliff.
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He made an illegal ewe turn.
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How is Donald Trump going to create middle class jobs?

By paying them to cheer for him during campaign events.
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What did the boat say to the pier?

What's up, dock?
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What kind of pants do ghosts wear?

Boo-Jeans.
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Why did the football coach go to the bank?

To get his quarterback.
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What kind of driver has no arms or legs?

A screwdriver.
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What is the best thing to do if you find a gorilla in your bed?

Sleep somewhere else.
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What did one titration say to the other?

"Let's meet at the endpoint."
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