How many lesbians does it take to change a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and two to talk about how much better it is than with a man.
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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Why to lawyers wear neckties?

To keep the foreskin from crawling up their chins.
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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How many charismatics does it take to change a light bulb?

Three - one to cast the bulb into the outer darkness, and two to catch it when it falls.
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What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes?

Answer: The back of his head.
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them
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Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon?

He took them to a pignic.
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What did the snail say when he got on the turtle's shell?

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
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