How many lesbians does it take to change a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and two to talk about how much better it is than with a man.
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Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!
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Why did the tree go to the dentist?

It needed a root canal.
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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How many Wardrobe people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

"Nobody said I needed doubles on that!"
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How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks
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What emotional disorder does a gas chromatograph suffer from?

Separation anxiety.
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What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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How many efficiency experts does it take to replace a light bulb?

None. Efficiency experts replace only dark bulbs.
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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