How many lesbians does it take to change a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and two to talk about how much better it is than with a man.


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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood

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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.

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What bird can lift the most?

A crane.

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What's an alligator's favorite drink?

Gator-Ade.

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How many conservatives does it take to change a light bulb?

One; after reflecting in the twilight on the merit of the previous bulb.

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How many U.S marines does it take to screw in a light bulb?

50. One to screw in the light bulb and the remaining 49 to guard him .

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Where do you get whales weighed?

At the Whale-weigh station.
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What is the difference between a lawyer and a rooster?

When a rooster wakes up in the morning, its primal urge is to cluck defiance.
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