How many lesbians does it take to change a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and two to talk about how much better it is than with a man.
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How do dinosaurs pay their bills?

With Tyrannosaurus checks.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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How many Feminists does it take to change a light bulb?

That's not funny!!!
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What message did Bach have on his answering machine?

"This phone is baroque, please call Bach later."

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vulture?

The lawyer gets frequent flyer miles.
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What do aliens on the metric system say?

Take me to your liter.
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What do bees do with their honey?

They cell it.
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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