How many lesbians does it take to change a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and two to talk about how much better it is than with a man.
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Which candles burn longer, bee's wax or tallow?

Neither, they all burn shorter.
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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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Why was 6 afraid of 7?

Because 7 ate 9.
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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How many bikers does it take to change a light bulb?

It takes two. One to change the bulb, and the other to kick the switch.
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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