How many lesbians does it take to change a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and two to talk about how much better it is than with a man.
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What did the ghost say to the other ghost?

Do you believe in humans?
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A Bhuddist monk goes to a hotdog stand

and says make me one with everything.
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What does the toast wear to bed?

Jammies!
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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What do camels use to hide themselves?

Camelflauge
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How do they serve smart hamburgers?

On honor rolls.
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes?

Answer: The back of his head.
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