How many lesbians does it take to change a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and two to talk about how much better it is than with a man.


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Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras

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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.

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What do a viola and a lawsuit have in common?

Everyone is happy when the case is closed

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How do Eskimos make their beds?

With sheets of ice and blankets of snow.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a gigolo?

A gigolo only screws one person at a time.
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Why did the news reporter go to the ice cream parlor?

Because she wanted to get a good scoop.
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What do you get if you cross an insect with the Easter rabbit?

Bugs Bunny.

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When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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