How many light bulbs does it take to change a light bulb?

One, if it knows its own Goedel number.
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What do you get if you cross an insect with the Easter rabbit?

Bugs Bunny.
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Where can you find a good lawyer?

In the cemetery
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Why did the chicken cross the clothing store?

To get to the other size!
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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Why was the math book sad?

It had too many problems.
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How do you make Holy water?

Take regular water and just boil the hell out of it.
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What has four legs, a trunk, and sunglasses?

A mouse on vacation.
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What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.
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