How many light bulbs does it take to change a light bulb?

One, if it knows its own Goedel number.
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What has four legs but never stands?

A Chair!
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Why was 6 afraid of 7?

Because 7 ate 9.
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A Bhuddist monk goes to a hotdog stand

and says make me one with everything.
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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How do you handle dangerous cheese?

Caerphilly.
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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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Some people believe that becoming a vegitarian is just a mistake...

A Missed-steak.
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Know how copper wire was invented?

Two lawyers were fighting over a penny.
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