How many light bulbs does it take to change a light bulb?

One, if it knows its own Goedel number.
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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What do you call a boomerang that won't come back?

A stick.
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Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?

Because there was no atmosphere.
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Which reindeer likes to clean?

Comet
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Where is a rabbit's favorite place to eat?

Ihop
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What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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How many Bratzlaver Chassidim does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They will never find one that burned as brightly as the first one.
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There were five people under one umbrella. Why didn't they get wet?

It wasn't raining!
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