How many light bulbs does it take to change a light bulb?

One, if it knows its own Goedel number.
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What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.
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What did one cow say to the other?

Mooooooove over
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What do basketball players and babies have in common?

They both dribble.
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I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite

He said NaBrO
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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When does New Year's Day come before Christmas Day?

Every year!
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How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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How many referral agents does it take to change a light bulb?

Two: One to screw you out of a fee, and the other to send you to a store where they ran out of bulbs weeks ago.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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