How many light bulbs does it take to change a light bulb?

One, if it knows its own Goedel number.
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How do you make an egg laugh?

Tell it a yolk.
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Some people believe that becoming a vegitarian is just a mistake...

A Missed-steak.
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What is the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb?

You can unscrew a light bulb.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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How many economists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assume the ladder and one to change the bulb.

A': None. If the government would just leave it alone, it would screw itself in.
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Have you heard the joke about the butter?

I better not tell you, it might spread.
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What's the difference between a vacuum cleaner and a lawyer on a motorcycle?

The vacuum cleaner has the dirt bag on the inside.
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What do you call a fat pumpkin?

A plumpkin.
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Why did the Blonde stare at the Orange Juice carton?

Because it said CONCENTRATE.
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