How many light bulbs does it take to change a light bulb?

One, if it knows its own Goedel number.
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How many APL hackers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There's a primitive for that.
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How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb

Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got this neat candle holder...
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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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What would happen if pigs could fly?

The price of bacon would go up.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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