How many light bulbs does it take to change a light bulb?

One, if it knows its own Goedel number.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.
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What do ghosts eat for supper?

Spooketi
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How many accountants does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What kind of answer did you have in mind?
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How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it sure takes a shitload of light bulbs!
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.
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Where does an elephant pack his luggage?

In his trunk
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What cell phones do travelling nuns use?

Virgin mobile.
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