How many light bulbs does it take to change a light bulb?

One, if it knows its own Goedel number.
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What happens when frogs park illegally?

They get toad.
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What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.
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What do you call a smiling, sober, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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How do we know the Indians were the first people in North America?

They had reservations.
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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Which is the most religious cheese?

Emmental...it's very hol(e)y...
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