How many light bulbs does it take to change a light bulb?

One, if it knows its own Goedel number.
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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How many hardware engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Any changes will have to be implemented in software.
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How many cats does it takes to screw in a light bulb?

You can throw away your light bulbs. Just douse the cat with gasoline, light it up with a match, and you'll have all the light you need. (Comment: BLEAH!)
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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Don't trust atoms,

they make up everything.
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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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How many economists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assume the ladder and one to change the bulb.

A': None. If the government would just leave it alone, it would screw itself in.
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Why is Donald Trump always seen with Melania?

Because all his other wives support Hillary.
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How many subscribers to AOL does it take to change a light bulb?

What? You can change light bulbs?
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