How many light bulbs does it take to change a light bulb?

One, if it knows its own Goedel number.
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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What do you call a calf after it's six months old?

Seven months old.
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.
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How many shaggy dogs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Fewer than it takes to screw in a heavy bulb.
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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Why can't Donald Trump be a Lannister?

Because he never pays his debts.
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What do you call a cheese factory in the Middle East?

Cheeses of Nazareth.
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