How many light bulbs does it take to change a light bulb?

One, if it knows its own Goedel number.
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What would you call a humorous knee?

Fun-ny!
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Why did the cat go to Minnesota?

To get a mini soda
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How many Sound Recordists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

WHAT?
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Customer: "Do you have alligator shoes?"

Clerk: "Yes, sir. What size does your alligator wear?"
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What's the difference between a female lawyer and a pitbull?

Lipstick.
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.
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How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit
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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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