How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.

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How do we know the Indians were the first people in North America?

They had reservations.

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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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Don't trust atoms,

they make up everything.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.

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I was in Tesco's and I saw this man and woman wrapped in a barcode.

I said, "Are you two an item?"

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Who makes dinosaur clothes?

A dino-sewer.

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