How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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How do you get a trumpet to sound like a french horn?

Put your hand in the bell and play a lot of wrong notes.

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What kind of pants do ghosts wear?

Boo-Jeans.
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Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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How do you know an elephant has been in your refrigerator?

There are footprints in the butter.
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What does a cat call a hummingbird?

Fast food.
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How many ``pro-lifers'' does it take to change a light bulb?

6: 2 to screw in the bulb and 4 to testify that it was lit from the moment they began screwing.
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What kind of potato chips fly?

Plane ones.
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