How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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Do you know how many musicians it takes to change a light bulb?

No, but hum a few bars and I'll fake it.
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What is black when clean, and white when dirty?

A blackboard.
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Old chemists never die,

they just stop reacting.
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech?

After you die, a leech stops sucking your blood.
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Which search engine is popular amongst mice?

Ask Cheese.
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How many (Generals/Politicians) does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.
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