How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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How many managers does it take to change a light bulb?

Nearly unanswerable, since the one who tries to change it usually drops it, and the others call for a planning session.
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What do you call a pig that's been arrested for dangerous driving?

A road hog.
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Making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon
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What do you call someone who hangs around with musicians?

A drummer

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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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