How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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How many fatalists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What does it matter? we're all gonna die anyway.
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Where does a polarbear keep its money?

In a snow bank!
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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Why did the boy take a ladder to school?

He wanted to go to high school!
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What does Santa like to do in the garden?

Hoe, hoe, hoe!
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What did the little girl say when she had to choose between a tricycle and a candy bar?

"Trike or Treat"?
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