How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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How many chiropractors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but it takes six visits.
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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What happens when you play "the blues" backwards?

Your wife comes back to you, your dog returns to life and you get out of prison.

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What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?

Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.
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What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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