How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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What do you call a deer with no eyes?

No I deer
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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How many referral agents does it take to change a light bulb?

Two: One to screw you out of a fee, and the other to send you to a store where they ran out of bulbs weeks ago.
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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Why can't lawyers do NMR?

Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb?

One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum.
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