How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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Red sky at night: shepherd’s delight.

Blue sky at night: day.
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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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How many WASPs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Silly, WASPs don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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How many plastic surgeons does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he'll also want to do something about your nose.
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How do you tell you're kissing a french horn player?

He/She keeps trying to stick their fist up your butt.

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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar.

The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"
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What did Tennessee?
The same thing Arkansas.
What did Delaware?

Her New Jersey.
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