How many magicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends on what you want to change it into.

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What did the little girl say when she had to choose between a tricycle and a candy bar?

"Trike or Treat"?
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What is a ghost's favorite pie?

Booberry pie!
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated

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How do locomotives hear?

Through the engineers.
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What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes?

Answer: The back of his head.
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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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Why did the banana go to the hospital?

Because he wasn't peeling well!

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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog

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