How many magicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends on what you want to change it into.

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Why can't you compare Donald Trump to cancer?

Because sometimes you can get rid of cancer.
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky

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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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What do you get if Bach falls off a horse but has the courage to get on again and continue riding?

Bach in the saddle again.

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Who did Frankenstein take to the dance?

His "ghoul" friend!
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Helium walks into a bar,
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."

Helium doesn't react.
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Don't trust atoms,

they make up everything.
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Why did the boy take a ladder to school?

He wanted to go to high school!
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How many frat guys does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and the other two to help him down off the keg.

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