How many magicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends on what you want to change it into.
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What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.
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What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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How many existentialists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to screw it in and one to observe how the light bulb itself symbolizes a single incandescent beacon of subjective reality in a netherworld of endless absurdity reaching out toward a maudlin cosmos of nothingness.
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What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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How do you fix a broken Tuba.

With a tuba glue.
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What has a lot of keys but can not open any doors?

A piano.
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