How many magicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends on what you want to change it into.
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How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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What does cheese say to itself in the mirror?

Halloumi.
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Where does Friday come before Monday?

In the dictionary.
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What happened when 500 hares got loose on Main Street?

The police had to comb the area.
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How did the egg cross the road?

It scrambled across!
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I backed a horse last week at ten to one.

It came in at quarter past four.

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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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