How many magicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends on what you want to change it into.
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What do you call an exploding monkey?

A baboom
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How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away his credit card
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How many [ethnic] gods does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to hold the bulb and the other to rotate the planet.
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What has four legs, a trunk, and sunglasses?

A mouse on vacation.
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What's the difference between a female lawyer and a pitbull?

Lipstick.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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What did the policeman say when his tummy was rumbling?

Stop! You're under a vest.
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What is a cheetahs favorite food?

Fast food

A team of little animals and a team of big animals decided to play football. During the first half of the game, the big animals were winning. But during the second half,a centipede scored so many touchdowns that the little animals won the game. When the game was over, the chipmunk asked the centipede, "Where were you during the first half?" He replied "Putting on my shoes".
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How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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