How many magicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends on what you want to change it into.
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How many Italians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

I dunno exactly, but my brother's girlfriend's father's boss's secretary's sister's next-door neighbors' priest's cousin's union shop steward's uncle's Knights Of Columbus club Sergeant-of-Arms's nephew's best friend did it real cheap for me once.
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What washes up on small beaches?

Microwaves.
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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How many astronomers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Astronomers prefer the dark.
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What do you call the king of vegetables?

Elvis Parsley.
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How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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A Bhuddist monk goes to a hotdog stand

and says make me one with everything.
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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