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How many magicians does it take to change a light bulb?
Depends on what you want to change it into.
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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?
Breaking up is hard to do.
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How many dadaists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
To get to the other side.
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?
Sandy Claws.
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??
None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?
As far away as possible.
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Why does a dog wag its tail?
Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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Why did the turtle cross the road?
To get to the shell station.
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How many lesbians does it take to change a light bulb?
Three: One to screw it in, and two to talk about how much better it is than with a man.
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?
Polar Bond.
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