How many Marxists does it take to change a light bulb?

None. The light bulb contains the seeds of its own revolution.
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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What has 6 eyes but can't see?

3 blind mice.
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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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I'll tell you what I love doing more than anything: trying to pack myself in a small suitcase.

I can hardly contain myself.

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You see my next-door neighbour worships exhaust pipes,

he's a catholic converter.


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Why can't a bicycle stand up?

Because it's two tired!
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What kind of jam can you not eat?

A traffic jam.
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