How many Marxists does it take to change a light bulb?

None. The light bulb contains the seeds of its own revolution.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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What do you get when you cross a Cocker Spaniel,
a Poodle and a ghost?

A cocker poodle boo.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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What creature is smarter than a talking parrot?

A spelling bee!
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How many frat guys does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and the other two to help him down off the keg.
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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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