How many Mensans does it take to tell Mensa light bulb jokes?

Five. One to tell the joke and one to get it.
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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vulture?

The lawyer gets frequent flyer miles.
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Why did the baseball player bring a rope to the game?

Because he wanted to tie the score!
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How many junkies does it take to change a light bulb?

Oh wow, is it, like, dark, man?
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How many Bratzlaver Hasidim does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They will never find a bulb that burns as brightly as the old one.
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Why did the surfer think the sea was his friend?

Because it gave him a big wave!
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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What has 4 wheels, gives milk, and eats grass.

A cow on a skateboard.
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