How many Mensans does it take to tell Mensa light bulb jokes?

Five. One to tell the joke and one to get it.
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How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them
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How do you fix a broken Tuba.

With a tuba glue.
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How do locomotives hear?

Through the engineers.
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I'm on a whiskey diet.

I've lost three days already.

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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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Why did the strawberry call 911?

It was in a jam!
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Where can you find a good lawyer?

In the cemetery
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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How many junkies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

``Oh wow, is it like dark, man?''
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