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How many Mensans does it take to tell Mensa light bulb jokes?
Five. One to tell the joke and one to get it.
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I'm on a whiskey diet.
I've lost three days already.
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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?
Fireballs.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.
but enough about Kanye West.
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What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?
Big holes all over Australia!
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What do an accordion and a lawsuit have in common?
Everyone is relieved when the case is closed.
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?
The Presidential Seal.
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What has one horn and gives milk?
A milk truck.
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?
A ferrous wheel.
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How many Real Men does it take to change a light bulb?
None. Real Men aren't afraid of the dark.
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