How many Mensans does it take to tell Mensa light bulb jokes?

Five. One to tell the joke and one to get it.
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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What goes under your feet and over your head?

A jump rope.
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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What do Russians use for napkins?

Soviets
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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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What do have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand?

Not enough sand.
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What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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