How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only two, but the hard part is getting them into the light bulb.
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Once there was a family called the Biggers. There was Mr. Bigger, Mrs. Bigger, and their son. Who was bigger, Mr. Bigger or his son?

His son, because he's a little Bigger!
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What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium
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What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile
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How do you fix a broken brass instrument?

With a Tuba glue.

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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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How many junkies does it take to change a light bulb?

Oh wow, is it, like, dark, man?
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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What is a snowman's favorite breakfast?

Frosted Flakes!
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A man goes to a zoo and discovers there is only one animal and it's a dog.

It was a Shih Tzu
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