How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only two, but the hard part is getting them into the light bulb.
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How many fundamentalists does it take to change a light bulb?

None; the Bible doesn't mention any light bulbs.
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What did the Donald tell an illegal immigrant who was trying to put out a fire at Trump Tower?

No way Hose A.
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What kind of shoes do bannanas make?

Slippers!
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Customer: "Do you have alligator shoes?"

Clerk: "Yes, sir. What size does your alligator wear?"
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How many Christians does it take to change a light bulb?

Three, but they're really only one.
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Why did the belt go to jail?

It held up a pair of pants.
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What has four legs, a trunk, and sunglasses?

A mouse on vacation.
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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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