How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only two, but the hard part is getting them into the light bulb.
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What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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What's an alligator's favorite drink?

Gator-Ade.
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There was a rooster sitting on a top of a barn. If it laid an egg, which way would it roll?

Roosters don't lay eggs!
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When does New Year's Day come before Christmas Day?

Every year!
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Why did the drum take a nap?

It was beat.
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How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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Why did the chicken cross the clothing store?

To get to the other size!
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Why did the cookie go to the Doctor?

Because he was feeling crumby.
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