How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only two, but the hard part is getting them into the light bulb.
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How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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What does Melania see in Donald Trump?

"Ten billion dollars and high cholesterol!"
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What is worse then having one baby screaming?

Two babies screaming!
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A small piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner. "Oh Bunsen, my flame," the sodium pined. "I melt whenever I see you,"

The Bunsen burner replied, "It's just a phase you're going through."
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras
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What's the difference between a mosquito and a lawyer?

One is a blood-sucking parasite, the other is an insect.
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What kind of cats like to go bowling?

Alley cats.
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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