How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only two, but the hard part is getting them into the light bulb.
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What do you get if you cross an insect with the Easter rabbit?

Bugs Bunny.
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Why are the middle ages sometimes called the Dark Ages?

Because they had so many knights.
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There were two cows in a paddock. One of the cows says, "moo"

and the other one says, "That's what I was going to say."
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What kind of phones do people in jail use?

Cell phones
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How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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Why did the cat go to Minnesota?

To get a mini soda
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Why can't a bicycle stand up?

Because it's two tired!
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A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself.

The blonde responds to the husband, "Shut up...you're next!"
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How many Wardrobe people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

"Nobody said I needed doubles on that!"
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