How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only two, but the hard part is getting them into the light bulb.
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Why did the calendar write its will?

Its days were numbered.
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What's the definition of a minor second?

Two flutes playing in unison.

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Why are there fences around a graveyard?

Because people are dying to get in!
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What kind of math do Snowy Owls like?

Owlgebra
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When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!
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What is Claustrophobia?

The fear of Santa Claus.
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Why did the elephant leave the circus?

He was tired of working for peanuts.
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Where does the snowman hide his money?

In the snow bank.
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What did the policeman say when his tummy was rumbling?

Stop! You're under a vest.
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