How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only two, but the hard part is getting them into the light bulb.
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Some lettuce, an egg, and a faucet had a race. What was the result?

The lettuce came in ahead, the egg got beat and the faucet is still running.
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What do you call a movie about Donald Trump, Bernie Madoff, and Kenneth Lay?

The League of Extraordinary Con Men.
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to take notes while the other screws it into the faucet.
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How did the egg cross the road?

It scrambled across!
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How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks
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What did the alien say when he was out of room?

I'm all spaced out!
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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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Where do horses live?

In the neigh-borhood.
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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