How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only two, but the hard part is getting them into the light bulb.
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What is Donald Trump "really" trying to do?

Make America Hate Again.
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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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Who can hold up a bus with one hand?

A crossing guard.
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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