How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only two, but the hard part is getting them into the light bulb.
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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What do a viola and a lawsuit have in common?

Everyone is happy when the case is closed

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What do planets like to read?

Comet books!
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What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on it?

It gave a little wine
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What do you call a song sung in an automobile?

A cartoon.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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Why can't you say a joke while standing on ice?

Because it might crack up!
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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What kind of music do planets sing?

Neptunes!
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