How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only two, but the hard part is getting them into the light bulb.
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Do you know how to save a drowning lawyer?

Take your foot off his head.
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I was in Tesco's and I saw this man and woman wrapped in a barcode.

I said, "Are you two an item?"

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What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?

OH SNaP!
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How many Holocaust revisionists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None: they just deny that the bulb ever went out in the first place.
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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In what school do you learn how to greet people?

Hi school.
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How do you make a cello sound beautiful?

Sell it and buy a violin

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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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How many Sound Recordists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

WHAT?
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