How many Microsoft executives does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Bill Gates will just redefine Darkness® as the industry standard.
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

He got caught peeping on a test.
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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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How is Donald Trump going to create middle class jobs?

By paying them to cheer for him during campaign events.
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Have you heard the joke about the butter?

I better not tell you, it might spread.
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.
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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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