How many Microsoft executives does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Bill Gates will just redefine Darkness® as the industry standard.
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How can you get four suits for a dollar?


Buy a deck of cards.
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What is the difference between a fly and superman?

Superman can fly, but a fly cannot superman!
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Why can't Donald Trump be a Lannister?

Because he never pays his debts.
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What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

"Many hands make light work."
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How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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What did the rug say to the floor?

Don't move, I've got you covered.
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What do you call a Disney Princess that supports Donald Trump?

Snow White Supremacist.
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What emotional disorder does a gas chromatograph suffer from?

Separation anxiety.
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