How many militarists does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.
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What did one owl say to the other owl?

Happy Owl-ween!
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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How did the butcher introduce his wife?

Meet Patty.
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What kind of dessert does a ghost like?

I scream!
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of manure?

The bucket.
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Why do you think Civil Disobedience was such a fantastic essay?

Thoreau editing Thorough.
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