How many militarists does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.
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What did the little girl say when she had to choose between a tricycle and a candy bar?

"Trike or Treat"?
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Whats the difference between a cat and a compound sentence?

One has claws at the end of its paws and one has a pause at the end of its clause
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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.
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How do you cut a wave in half?

Use a sea saw.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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What's the definition of a minor second?

Two flutes playing in unison.

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What did Jay-z call his wife before they got married?

Feyonce

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What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.
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