How many militarists does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.
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How many chiropractors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but it takes six visits.
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How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb?

One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum.
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How many running-dog lackeys of the bourgeoisie does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to exploit the proletariat, and one to control the means of production!
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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Why did a boy thow a clock out the window?

To see time fly.
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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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