How many militarists does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.
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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.
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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."

The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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Where does a ten ton elephant sit?

Anywhere it wants to
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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What happened when the butcher backed up into his meat grinder?

he got a little behind in his work.
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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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