How many militarists does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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Went to the paper shop -

it had blown away.
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What do ghosts eat for supper?

Spooketi
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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How do you catch a unique bird?

Unique up on it.
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