How many militarists does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.
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What do a viola and a lawsuit have in common?

Everyone is happy when the case is closed

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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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What' the difference between a lawyer and a boxing referee?

A boxing referee doesn't get paid more for a longer fight.
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Whats the difference between a cat and a compound sentence?

One has claws at the end of its paws and one has a pause at the end of its clause
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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How many technical writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, provided there is a programmer around to explain how to do it.
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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison
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What kind of band can't play music?

A rubber band.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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