How many militarists does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.
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Where does a polarbear keep its money?

In a snow bank!
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What do you call a gorilla wearing earmuffs?

Anything you like, he can't hear you.
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How many sound engineers does it take to change a light bulb

None, sound engineers don't do lights
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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What did the alien say to the cat?

Take me to your litter.
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How do they serve smart hamburgers?

On honor rolls.
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Humpty Trumpty wants a great wall.

Humpty Trumpty wants Mexico to pay for it all.
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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