How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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What is a ghost's favorite fruit?

Booberries!
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What would happen if pigs could fly?

The price of bacon would go up.
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How many college girls does it take to change a light bulb?

That's "women," you unfunny jerk!
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What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.
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Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?

It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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There were two cows in a paddock. One of the cows says, "moo"

and the other one says, "That's what I was going to say."
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