How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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What starts with E, ends with E and only has one letter?

An envelope.
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Why did the boy have his girlfriend put in jail?

She stole his heart.
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How many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three, One to climb the ladder. One to shake it. And one to sue the ladder company.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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What is a tree's favorite drink?

Root beer.
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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