How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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Why did the gardener plant his money?

He wanted his soil to be rich!
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How many dull people does it take to change a light bulb?

One.
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How many bureaucrats does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assure the everything possible is being done while the other screws the bulb into the water faucet.
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A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then

*poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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