How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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What did one owl say to the other owl?

Happy Owl-ween!
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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What do you call a deer with no eyes?

No I deer
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A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why?" they asked, as they moved off.

"because," he said "I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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