How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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Why can't Donald Trump be a Lannister?

Because he never pays his debts.
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Why did the drum take a nap?

It was beat.
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I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah;

I thought, "He's trying to pull a fast one".

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What do you call a beautiful woman on a trombonist's arm?

A tattoo.

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What's the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer?

One's a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.
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How many Anglicans does it take to change a lightbulb?

A whole synod. One to move that the bulb be changed while the others debate until the room spins.
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What does the winner of the race lose?

His breath.
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