How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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How many bureaucrats does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assure the everything possible is being done while the other screws the bulb into the water faucet.
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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Why is the French horn the most divine instrument?

Man blows into it, but God only knows what comes out

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Who makes the best cake on a baseball team?

The batter.
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A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why?" they asked, as they moved off.

"because," he said "I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."
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What do you get if you cross an insect with the Easter rabbit?

Bugs Bunny.
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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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