How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.

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Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia?

Because it's pretty basic stuff.
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Earlier this year I saw The Theory of Everything loved it.

Should've been called Look Who's Hawking, that's my only criticism.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest.. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win.

Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.

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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze

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