How many mystery writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two — one to screw it most of the way in and the other to give it a surprise twist at the end.
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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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What goes up and down but never moves?

Stairs.
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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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How many hardware folks does it take to change a light bulb?

None. That's a software problem.
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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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How many singers from Nashville does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love he is with the new one, and one to go "Yee-Hah!" and throw his cowboy hat in the air.
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