How many mystery writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two — one to screw it most of the way in and the other to give it a surprise twist at the end.
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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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What did the little girl say when she had to choose between a tricycle and a candy bar?

"Trike or Treat"?
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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How can you get four suits for a dollar?


Buy a deck of cards.
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What did the pencil say to the paper?

I dot my i's on you!
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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What did the porcupine say to the cactus?

Is that you mommy?
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