How many mystery writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two — one to screw it most of the way in and the other to give it a surprise twist at the end.
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Online money has recently been discovered to be a not-yet-identified super heavy element.

The proposed name is: Un-obtainium.
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What country makes you shiver?

Chile.
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.
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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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What did the little girl say when she had to choose between a tricycle and a candy bar?

"Trike or Treat"?
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a trampoline?

You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline.
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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