How many mystery writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two — one to screw it most of the way in and the other to give it a surprise twist at the end.
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What is a frog's favorite year?

Leap Year
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What do sea monsters eat for lunch?

Fish and ships.
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When does New Year's Day come before Christmas Day?

Every year!
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What is a tree's favorite drink?

Root beer.
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Why did the banana go to the hospital?

Because he wasn't peeling well!
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What is a lion's favorite state?

Maine
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.
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What do Russians use for napkins?

Soviets
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