How many mystery writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two — one to screw it most of the way in and the other to give it a surprise twist at the end.
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How many bureaucrats does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assure the everything possible is being done while the other screws the bulb into the water faucet.
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Online money has recently been discovered to be a not-yet-identified super heavy element.

The proposed name is: Un-obtainium.
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What do birds say on Halloween?

Twick o tweet
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Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?

It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.
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What two things can you not have for breakfast?

Lunch and dinner.
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What do you get when you cross a Cocker Spaniel,
a Poodle and a ghost?

A cocker poodle boo.
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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck
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Who makes dinosaur clothes?

A dino-sewer.
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What do Michael Jackson and x-boxs have in common?

They're both plastic and little boys turn them on.
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