How many nuclear engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to install the new bulb and six to figure out what to do with the old one for the next 10,000 years.
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.
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What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?

OH SNaP!
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What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None 'o yo' fuckin' business!
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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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How many investment brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes.
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What do you get if you cross an insect with the Easter rabbit?

Bugs Bunny.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a prostitute?

A prostitute will stop screwing you when you're dead.
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