How many nuclear engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to install the new bulb and six to figure out what to do with the old one for the next 10,000 years.
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What did the ghost say to the other ghost?

Do you believe in humans?
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What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on it?

It gave a little wine
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Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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My first girlfriend was a tennis player but she broke my heart.

It was like love meant nothing to her.
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What do you call cheese that isn't yours?

Nacho cheese.
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Why do you think Civil Disobedience was such a fantastic essay?

Thoreau editing Thorough.
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What is a cat's favorite movie?

The sound of Mew-sic
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