How many nuclear engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to install the new bulb and six to figure out what to do with the old one for the next 10,000 years.
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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Why did the oreo go to the dentist?

To get his filling!
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What did one eye say to the other?

Between you and me, something smells.
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When Susan's boyfriend proposed marriage to her she said: "I love the simple things in life,

but I don't want one of them for my husband".

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How many Microsoft executives does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Bill Gates will just redefine Darkness® as the industry standard.
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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change the bulb and three to whine "It's too high"
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