How many nuclear engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to install the new bulb and six to figure out what to do with the old one for the next 10,000 years.
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Customer: "Do you have alligator shoes?"

Clerk: "Yes, sir. What size does your alligator wear?"
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I went to the doctors the other day and I said, 'Have you got anything for wind?'

So he gave me a kite.

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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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What does cheese say to itself in the mirror?

Halloumi.
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A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then

*poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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