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How many nuclear engineers does it take to change a light bulb?
Seven. One to install the new bulb and six to figure out what to do with the old one for the next 10,000 years.
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?
A fire cracker
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Why did God make snakes just before lawyers?
To practice.
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What is Donald Trump telling all his supporters?
Orange Is The New Black.
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?
The Elfabet.
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Where do fish keep their money?
In a river bank
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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?
He felt funny.
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What has holes all over and holds water?
A sponge!
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Why didn't the girl take the bus home?
Because her mom would make her take it back.
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.
I’m just doing it for kicks.
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