How many nuclear engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to install the new bulb and six to figure out what to do with the old one for the next 10,000 years.
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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What do you call a fat pumpkin?

A plumpkin.
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What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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What happens when spectroscopists are idle?

They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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The defendant is accused of putting dynamite into a steer.

Abominable! [A Bomb In a Bull]
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