How many nuclear engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to install the new bulb and six to figure out what to do with the old one for the next 10,000 years.
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What can you hold without using your hands?

Your breath!
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Why did the farmer wear one boot to town?

Because he heard there would be a 50% chance of snow!
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Where does the snowman hide his money?

In the snow bank.
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?

A Flat Major

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Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle!

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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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What did one wall say to the other?

I'll meet you at the corner.
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What did one elevator say to the other?

I think I'm coming down with something!
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