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How many nuclear engineers does it take to change a light bulb?
Seven. One to install the new bulb and six to figure out what to do with the old one for the next 10,000 years.
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How do Vikings send secret messages?
Norse code.
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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?
C over lambda.
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Sherlock, what are you doing with that 200lbs shrub?
It's not a shrub, it's a lemon tree my dear Watson.
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.
People must be dying to get in there.
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What kind of dress can't be worn?
Address.
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?
Five after one.
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Do you know how many musicians it takes to change a light bulb?
No, but hum a few bars and I'll fake it.
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A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then
*poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
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What did Tennessee?
The same thing Arkansas.
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