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How many nuclear engineers does it take to change a light bulb?
Seven. One to install the new bulb and six to figure out what to do with the old one for the next 10,000 years.
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What did one wall say to the other?
I'll meet you at the corner.
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What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?
Hope it's Halloween!!
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What did the drummer get on his I.Q. Test?
Saliva
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?
A lawn moo-er.
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My phone will ring at 2 in the morning, and my wife'll look at me and go, "Who's that calling at this time?' "I don't know!
If I knew that we wouldn't need the bloody phone!"
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What kind of phones do people in jail use?
Cell phones
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There were five people under one umbrella. Why didn't they get wet?
It wasn't raining!
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What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?
A buck.
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I’ve never gone to a gun range before.
I decided to give it a shot!
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