How many PA' does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What's a light bulb?
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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What do you call a beautiful woman on a trombonist's arm?

A tattoo.

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A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself.

The blonde responds to the husband, "Shut up...you're next!"
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What do you call a deer with no eyes?

No I deer
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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