How many PA' does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What's a light bulb?
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What's the one thing that never works when it's fixed?

A jury.
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Helium walks into a bar,
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."

Helium doesn't react.
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What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?

Its shadow
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Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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What do camels use to hide themselves?

Camelflauge
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What's the difference between a musician and a 14-inch pizza?

A 14-inch pizza can feed a family of four

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