How many plastic surgeons does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he'll also want to do something about your nose.

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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.

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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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What do you call a song sung in an automobile?

A cartoon.

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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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What does a lawyer get when you give him Viagra?

Taller
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.

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Why doesn't Melania Trump want to be the first lady?

Because she would have to move into a smaller house.
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Why do they bury lawyers under 20 feet of dirt?

Because deep down, they're really good people.
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