How many plastic surgeons does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he'll also want to do something about your nose.
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What do you call lending money to a bison?

A buff-a-loan
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What did rural America tell Donald Trump?

You're Hired.
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How many nuclear engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to install the new bulb and six to figure out what to do with the old one for the next 10,000 years.
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What do you call someone who hangs around with musicians?

A drummer

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Dorian Gray Jokes,

they never get old!
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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Why did New Jersey get all the toxic waste and California all the lawyers?

New Jersey got to pick first.
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When does New Year's Day come before Christmas Day?

Every year!
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What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.
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