How many plastic surgeons does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he'll also want to do something about your nose.
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Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

He got caught peeping on a test.
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How do you cut a wave in half?

Use a sea saw.
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What do you call lending money to a bison?

A buff-a-loan
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Why did the boy take a ladder to school?

He wanted to go to high school!
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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Why did the tree get a computer?

To log on.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A blushing zebra.
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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