How many plastic surgeons does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he'll also want to do something about your nose.
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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What is King Arthur's favorite fish?

A swordfish
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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.
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Why can't a bicycle stand up?

Because it's two tired!
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Humpty Trumpty wants a great wall.

Humpty Trumpty wants Mexico to pay for it all.
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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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Why do some people have an instant aversion to banjo players?

It saves time in the long run.

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How many Bratzlaver Chassidim does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They will never find one that burned as brightly as the first one.
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