How many plastic surgeons does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he'll also want to do something about your nose.
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What's the only difference between Donald Trump and Bozo the Clown?

Bozo The Clown has real hair on his head.
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Went to the paper shop -

it had blown away.
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What does Donald Trump say when he can't find his Viagra?

"The erection is rigged!"
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What is black ,white and red all over?

A sunburnt penguin
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How many "pro-lifers" does it take to change a light bulb?

Six: two to screw in the bulb and four to testify that it was lit from the moment they began screwing.
None; the bulb will change itself when it is ready.
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What has 6 eyes but can't see?

3 blind mice.
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How many Einsteins does it take to change a light bulb?

That depends on the speed of the change and the mass of the bulb. Or vice versa, of course. It just might be easier to leave the bulb and change the room. It's all relative.
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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What would happen if pigs could fly?

The price of bacon would go up.
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