How many plastic surgeons does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he'll also want to do something about your nose.

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Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?

It went OK.
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What did the alien say to the cat?

Take me to your litter.

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How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?

Squeaky clean

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What did one magnet say to the other?

I find you very attractive.

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What is the most important rule in chemistry?

Never lick the spoon!
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What did the little girl say when she had to choose between a tricycle and a candy bar?

"Trike or Treat"?
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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What is a cat's favorite breakfast?

Mice krispies

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Who earns a living by driving his customers away?

A taxi driver.
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