How many plastic surgeons does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he'll also want to do something about your nose.
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Who did Frankenstein take to the dance?

His "ghoul" friend!
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He made an illegal ewe turn.
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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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What`s black & white & red all over?

An embarrased mime!
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Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away his credit card
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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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