How many plastic surgeons does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he'll also want to do something about your nose.

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What's the difference between an accountant and a lawyer?

Accountants know they're boring.

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Whats Donald Trump's favorite nation?

Discrimination.
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How do you catch a tame bird?

The tame way, unique up on it!

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What do you call a cheese factory in the Middle East?

Cheeses of Nazareth.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck

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What is the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb?

You can unscrew a light bulb.

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What is Donald Trumps campaign slogan?

"A complex world demands complex hair."
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A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar.

The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"

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What do you call 25 skydiving lawyers?

Skeet.
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