How many plastic surgeons does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he'll also want to do something about your nose.
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Why is Donald Trump always seen with Melania?

Because all his other wives support Hillary.
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What is a ghost's favorite pie?

Booberry pie!
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What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?

OH SNaP!
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How do you wake up Lady Gaga?

You Poke her face.

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What country makes you shiver?

Chile.
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How do you know an elephant has been in your refrigerator?

There are footprints in the butter.
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Why do they bury lawyers under 20 feet of dirt?

Because deep down, they're really good people.
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How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only two, but the hard part is getting them into the light bulb.
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How many Wardrobe people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

"Nobody said I needed doubles on that!"
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