How many plastic surgeons does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he'll also want to do something about your nose.
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Trump: "It's not a toupee,

I just found the Bush that Jeb lost."
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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What did the banana do when the monkey chased it?

The banana split
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What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.
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What kind of jam can you not eat?

A traffic jam.
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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