How many pre-med students does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: One to change the bulb and four to pull the ladder out from under him/her.
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What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?

OH SNaP!
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?

A Flat Major

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Why did New Jersey get all the toxic waste and California all the lawyers?

New Jersey got to pick first.
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What two things can you not have for breakfast?

Lunch and dinner.
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