How many pre-med students does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: One to change the bulb and four to pull the ladder out from under him/her.
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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Why did the gardener plant his money?

He wanted his soil to be rich!
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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What did the clock do after it ate?

It went back four seconds!
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Why did the calendar write its will?

Its days were numbered.
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How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb?

One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum.
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What is "HIJKLMNO"?

H2O.
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What is the difference between a locomotive engineer and a teacher?

One minds the train, one trains the mind.
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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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