How many pre-med students does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: One to change the bulb and four to pull the ladder out from under him/her.
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What do moms dress up as on Halloween?

Mummies!
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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When should you buy a bird?

When it's going cheep!

Did you hear the one about the crow and the telephone pole?
He wanted to make a long distance caw.
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I stayed up all night because I wanted to see where the sun went,

and then it dawned on me.
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What is the difference between a clarinet and an onion?

Nobody cries when you chop an clarinet into little pieces

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What do you call a dinosaur that smashes everything in its path?

Tyrannosaurus wrecks.
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How does a pig go to hospital?

In a hambulance.
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What did the laywer name his daughter?

Sue.
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What did the octopus say to his girlfriend when he proposed?

Can I have your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand in marriage?
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