How many pre-med students does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: One to change the bulb and four to pull the ladder out from under him/her.
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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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How many cops does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. It turned itself in.
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I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day

but I couldn't find any.

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How many Yuppies (WASPs) does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call the electrician, and one to mix the drinks.
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Why did the spy stay in bed?

Because he was under cover.
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What did the judge say to the dentist?

Do you swear to pull the tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth?
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So I met this gangster who pulls up the back of people's pants,

it was Wedgie Kray.

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How do you handle dangerous cheese?

Caerphilly.
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