How many pre-med students does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: One to change the bulb and four to pull the ladder out from under him/her.
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Why did the football coach go to the bank?

To get his quarterback.
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How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them
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What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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Don't trust atoms,

they make up everything.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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What is always hot in the refrigerator?

Chili
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