How many pre-med students does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: One to change the bulb and four to pull the ladder out from under him/her.
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A small piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner. "Oh Bunsen, my flame," the sodium pined. "I melt whenever I see you,"

The Bunsen burner replied, "It's just a phase you're going through."
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Why did the calendar write its will?

Its days were numbered.
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What do bees do with their honey?

They cell it.
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How many Bratzlaver Hasidim does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They will never find a bulb that burns as brightly as the old one.
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Why are the floors of basketball courts always so damp?

The players dribble a lot.
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Clowns divorce:

custardy battle.
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What did one wall say to the other?

I'll meet you at the corner.
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What is the snake's favorite subject?

Hiss-story
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What did the laywer name his daughter?

Sue.
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