How many pre-med students does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: One to change the bulb and four to pull the ladder out from under him/her.
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Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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What do you call a smiling, sober, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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What did the porcupine say to the cactus?

Is that you mommy?
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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How many IBM PC owners does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but she/he'll have to go out and buy the light bulb adaptor card first, which is extra.
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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.
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