How many pre-med students does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: One to change the bulb and four to pull the ladder out from under him/her.

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How many plastic surgeons does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he'll also want to do something about your nose.

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How do hair stylists speed up their job?

They take short cuts!
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Why do they bury lawyers under 20 feet of dirt?

Because deep down, they're really good people.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a gigolo?

A gigolo only screws one person at a time.
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My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well,

I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

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How many engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

First they have to agree on which is better; the analog bulb or a digital bulb.

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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop

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How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.

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What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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