How many pre-med students does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: One to change the bulb and four to pull the ladder out from under him/her.
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What did Jay-z call his wife before they got married?

Feyonce

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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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How do Eskimos make their beds?

With sheets of ice and blankets of snow.
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Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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What bird can lift the most?

A crane.
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What has four legs, a trunk, and sunglasses?

A mouse on vacation.
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What do you call a parrot that flew away?

A polygon
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Now that Macy's has severed ties, with Donald Trump, how can the average American look like the President?

By hunting and killing their own hair piece.
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What does a witch use to keep her hair up?

Scarespray!
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