How many pre-med students does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: One to change the bulb and four to pull the ladder out from under him/her.
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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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What's a frog's favorite drink?

Croak-a-cola.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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What does cheese say to itself in the mirror?

Halloumi.
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A lorry-load of tortoises crashed into a trainload of terrapins,

What a turtle disaster

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What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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