How many professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but they get three tech. reports out of it.
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What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?

Hope it's Halloween!!
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What did one cow say to the other?

Mooooooove over
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How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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What do postal workers do when they're mad?

They stamp their feet.
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What is the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb?

You can unscrew a light bulb.
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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What did rural America tell Donald Trump?

You're Hired.
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What do vampires take when they are sick?

Coffin drops!
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