How many professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but they get three tech. reports out of it.
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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?

Because he had no BODY to go with.
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Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?

It went OK.
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Where are sharks from?

Finland.
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What is a baby's motto?

If at first you don't succeed, cry and cry again!
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What's the difference between a good lawyer and a bad lawyer?

A bad lawyer makes your case drag on for years. A good lawyer makes it last even longer.
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Why did the strawberry call 911?

It was in a jam!
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How many Ukrainians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None, because people who glow in the dark don't need light bulbs.

Note: Topical to the Chernobyl Reactor disaster of 1984.
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Can you say Richard and Robert had a rabbit without using the "r" sound?

Sure, Dick and Bob had a bunny!
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Where does an elephant pack his luggage?

In his trunk
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