How many professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but they get three tech. reports out of it.
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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What did one cow say to the other?

Mooooooove over
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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What do basketball players and babies have in common?

They both dribble.
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What do ghosts eat for supper?

Spooketi
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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They stopped a vulture from bringing his rotting carcasses on the plane

but he said "You said I could have two carry on items!"
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