How many professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but they get three tech. reports out of it.
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There was an explosion at a cheese factory in France...

all that was left was de brie.
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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Kleptomaniacs just don't get puns

they always take things literally.
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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What do you get when you cross a Cocker Spaniel,
a Poodle and a ghost?

A cocker poodle boo.
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!
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How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They have machines to do that now.
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What is the most important rule in chemistry?

Never lick the spoon!
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