How many professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but they get three tech. reports out of it.
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What do you call cheese that isn't yours?

Nacho cheese.
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What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.
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What is black and white and red all over?

A skunk with a rash.
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How many believable, competent, ``just-right-for-the-job'' presidential candidates does it take to change a light bulb?

It's going to be a dark 4 years, isn't it?
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What kind of mouse does not eat, drink, or even walk?

A computer mouse.
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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How many Psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but the bulb has got to really WANT to change.
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What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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