How many professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but they get three tech. reports out of it.
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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How many [ethnics] does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Ten. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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How many [ethnic] gods does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to hold the bulb and the other to rotate the planet.
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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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How many Cabbage Patch dolls does it take to change a light bulb?

The question is irrelevant, since you couldn't find the dolls even if you knew how many. (Note: Well, this was a good joke in 1983-84. . . .)
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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How do they serve smart hamburgers?

On honor rolls.
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How many orgy attenders does it take to change a lightbulb?

As many as possible, and don't *ask* what they do with the old bulb.
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How did the bubble gum cross the road?

On the bottom of the chicken's foot!
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