How many professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but they get three tech. reports out of it.
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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.
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Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!
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When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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How many singers from Nashville does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love he is with the new one, and one to go "Yee-Hah!" and throw his cowboy hat in the air.
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I think I want a job cleaning mirrors.


It's something I could really see myself doing.
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Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.
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How do hair stylists speed up their job?

They take short cuts!
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