How many ``pro-lifers'' does it take to change a light bulb?

6: 2 to screw in the bulb and 4 to testify that it was lit from the moment they began screwing.
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What music does cheese listen to?

R & Brie.
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?

Just in case he got a hole in one!
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Why did the carpenter fall asleep on the job?

He was board.
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Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses?

From chasing parked ambulances.
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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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What do you call a musician with a college degree?

Night manager at McDonalds

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