How many ``pro-lifers'' does it take to change a light bulb?

6: 2 to screw in the bulb and 4 to testify that it was lit from the moment they began screwing.
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How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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Why to lawyers wear neckties?

To keep the foreskin from crawling up their chins.
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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What country makes you shiver?

Chile.
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.
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Who did Frankenstein take to the dance?

His "ghoul" friend!
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