How many "pro-lifers" does it take to change a light bulb?

Six: two to screw in the bulb and four to testify that it was lit from the moment they began screwing.
None; the bulb will change itself when it is ready.
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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Did you hear about Michael Jackson's latest record?

"Feel the World."
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech?

After you die, a leech stops sucking your blood.
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How many brewers does it take to change a light bulb?

About one third less than for a regular bulb.
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Who earns a living by driving his customers away?

A taxi driver.
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What would you call a humorous knee?

Fun-ny!
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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When Susan's boyfriend proposed marriage to her she said: "I love the simple things in life,

but I don't want one of them for my husband".

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