How many "pro-lifers" does it take to change a light bulb?

Six: two to screw in the bulb and four to testify that it was lit from the moment they began screwing.
None; the bulb will change itself when it is ready.
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Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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How many hardware folks does it take to change a light bulb?

None. That's a software problem.
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!
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Anyone know any jokes about sodium?

Na
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Whats the difference between a cat and a compound sentence?

One has claws at the end of its paws and one has a pause at the end of its clause
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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What has holes all over and holds water?

A sponge!
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