How many "pro-lifers" does it take to change a light bulb?

Six: two to screw in the bulb and four to testify that it was lit from the moment they began screwing.
None; the bulb will change itself when it is ready.
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Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses?

From chasing parked ambulances.
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What is the definition of a shame (as in "that's a shame")?

When a busload of lawyers goes off a cliff.
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What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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What did the banana do when the monkey chased it?

The banana split
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Why did God invent lawyers?

So that real estate agents would have someone to look down on.
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Why did the cat go to Minnesota?

To get a mini soda
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