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How many "pro-lifers" does it take to change a light bulb?
Six: two to screw in the bulb and four to testify that it was lit from the moment they began screwing.
None; the bulb will change itself when it is ready.
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Which is the most religious cheese?
Emmental...it's very hol(e)y...
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What do you call a crate of ducks?
A box of quackers.
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I tried nutella on some salmon
got salmonella.
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How can you tell that a train just went by?
It left its tracks.
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?
Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?
Because of the bark
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.
I’m just doing it for kicks.
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What's the tallest building in the world?
The library, because it has the most stories.
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What are the 10 letters of the pirate alphabet?
Aye, Aye, Arr and the Seven C's
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