How many Psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but the bulb has got to really WANT to change.
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Why can't you compare Donald Trump to cancer?

Because sometimes you can get rid of cancer.
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How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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How do you wake up Lady Gaga?

You Poke her face.

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How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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What do you call an exploding monkey?

A baboom
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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How do you know when the moon has enough to eat?

When it's full.
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