How many punk rockers does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and seventeen on the guest list.
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What's an alligator's favorite drink?

Gator-Ade.
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What creature is smarter than a talking parrot?

A spelling bee!
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What does Santa like to do in the garden?

Hoe, hoe, hoe!
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Why did the girl throw the butter out the window?

She wanted to see a butterfly.
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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How are an apple and a lawyer alike?

They both look good hanging from a tree.
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What is a spaceman's favorite chocolate?

A marsbar!
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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?

Because he had no BODY to go with.
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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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