How many punk rockers does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and seventeen on the guest list.
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What is a cat's favorite breakfast?

Mice krispies
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.
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What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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How do chickens get strong?

Egg-cersize.
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What do Santa's elves drink?

Minnesoda.
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How many singers from Nashville does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love he is with the new one, and one to go "Yee-Hah!" and throw his cowboy hat in the air.
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What's worse than a centipede with athlete's foot?

A porcupine with split ends
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