How many punk rockers does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and seventeen on the guest list.
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When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!
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Why are elephants wrinkled?

Because they don't fit on a ironing board
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Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle!

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Why was the math book sad?

It had too many problems.
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You see my next-door neighbour worships exhaust pipes,

he's a catholic converter.


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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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How many `Real Women' does it take to change a light bulb?

None: A `Real Woman' would have plenty of real men around to do it.
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What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?

Its shadow
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How many investment brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes.
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