Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and seventeen on the guest list.
or
Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes.
or
Two: One to screw you out of a fee, and the other to send you to a store where they ran out of bulbs weeks ago.
or
She was the fairest in the land.
or
The lettuce came in ahead, the egg got beat and the faucet is still running.
or