How many radical feminists does it take to change a light bulb?

That isn't funny!
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How many teenage girls does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One, but she'll be on the phone for five hours telling all her friends about it.
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Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in mud, then cross the road again?

He was a dirty double crosser!
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What do you call a movie about Donald Trump, Bernie Madoff, and Kenneth Lay?

The League of Extraordinary Con Men.
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What does Donald Trump say when he can't find his Viagra?

"The erection is rigged!"
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Why did the TV cross the road?

Because it wanted to be a flat screen.
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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What do you call cheese that isn't yours?

Nacho cheese.
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Sherlock, what are you doing with that 200lbs shrub?

It's not a shrub, it's a lemon tree my dear Watson.
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What do you call a cow with no legs?

Ground beef.
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