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How many Real Men does it take to change a light bulb?
None. Real Men aren't afraid of the dark.
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What's black and white and red all over?
A sunburnt zebra.
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Where do fortune tellers dance?
At the crystal ball.
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What did the drummer get on his I.Q. Test?
Saliva
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How many singers from Nashville does it take to change a light bulb?
Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love he is with the new one, and one to go "Yee-Hah!" and throw his cowboy hat in the air.
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?
Laboratory Retrievers
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What did the peanut say to the walnut?
Nothing. Nuts can't talk.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.
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How many Jewish American Princesses does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Two, one to call Daddy, and one to get the (pick one:) mineral water/Tab.
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When is a car not a car?
When it turns into a garage.
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