How many Real Men does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Real Men aren't afraid of the dark.
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What do you call a smiling, sober, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.
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How do you make a million dollars singing jazz?

Start with two million.

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Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15 Degrees C

and still be 0k?
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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What happened when the monster ate the electric company?

He was in shock for a week.
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And the mermaid, that was weird. What was she wearing in math class?

An Algae-bra
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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?

None, because they were copycats
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What goes 99 thump,99 thump,99 thump?

A centipede with a wooden leg.
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