How many Real Men does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Real Men aren't afraid of the dark.
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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What does Donald Trump say when he can't find his Viagra?

"The erection is rigged!"
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How many Zen masters does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A tree in a golden forest.
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Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?

It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.
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What can you hold without using your hands?

Your breath!
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Why did the chicken cross the clothing store?

To get to the other size!
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