How many Real Men does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Real Men aren't afraid of the dark.
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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Do you know how to save a drowning lawyer?

Take your foot off his head.
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Whats Donald Trump's favorite nation?

Discrimination.
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Earlier this year I saw The Theory of Everything – loved it.

Should've been called Look Who's Hawking, that's my only criticism.
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What kind of dress can't be worn?

Address.
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What did the candle say to the other candle?

I'm going out tonight!
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How many conservatives does it take to change a light bulb?

One; after reflecting in the twilight on the merit of the previous bulb.
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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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