How many Real Men does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Real Men aren't afraid of the dark.
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How many efficiency experts does it take to replace a light bulb?

None. Efficiency experts replace only dark bulbs.
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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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A sandwich walks into a bar.

The barman says "Sorry we don't serve food in here"

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What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.
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Who says sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me?

A guy who has never been hit with a dictionary.
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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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