How many Real Men does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Real Men aren't afraid of the dark.
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Why was the mouse afraid of the water?

Catfish
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How many Microsoft executives does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Bill Gates will just redefine Darkness® as the industry standard.
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What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?

Holly Davidson.
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What did one elevator say to the other?

I think I'm coming down with something!
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Customer: "Do you have alligator shoes?"

Clerk: "Yes, sir. What size does your alligator wear?"
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How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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A man goes to a zoo and discovers there is only one animal and it's a dog.

It was a Shih Tzu
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Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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