How many Real Men does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Real Men aren't afraid of the dark.
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

"Many hands make light work."
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When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!
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How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change the bulb and three to whine "It's too high"
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How many supporters of George W. Bush does it take to change a light bulb?

None. First, denounce the nearest Democrats as liberal pantywaists who deliberately caused the bulb to blow. Second, announce that the Bush administration has proved that the science of electricity is faulty, so no action ever needs to be taken on global light change. Third, keep the need for a new light bulb strictly secret. Fourth, use the money for new light bulbs as an excuse for another tax cut for Bush's wealthy friends. Fifth, explain that you would never "disassemble" about the need for light, you are way too busy spreading freedom and democracy in the Middle East by eliminating freedom and democracy in the United States.
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What did Delaware?

A New Jersey.
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What do aliens on the metric system say?

Take me to your liter.
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How many technical writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, provided there is a programmer around to explain how to do it.
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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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How many stock brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes (knowing that it's already burned out).
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