How many Real Men does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Real Men aren't afraid of the dark.
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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What do you call someone who hangs around with musicians?

A drummer

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Why did the farmer wear one boot to town?

Because he heard there would be a 50% chance of snow!
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Why are there fences around a graveyard?

Because people are dying to get in!
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How do you make a cello sound beautiful?

Sell it and buy a violin

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How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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What clothes does a house wear?

Address.
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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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