How many Real Men does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Real Men aren't afraid of the dark.
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A jump-lead walks into a bar.

The barman says "I'll serve you, but don't start anything"
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There was a rooster sitting on a top of a barn. If it laid an egg, which way would it roll?

Roosters don't lay eggs!
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Why did they kick cinderella off the baseball team?

She kept running away from the ball.
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What is Donald Trump "really" trying to do?

Make America Hate Again.
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How many record producers does it take to change a lightbulb?

Two… one to tell the engineer to do it, the other to say "I don't know, what do you think?"

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What lies on its back, one hundred feet in the air?

A dead centipede.
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Old chemists never die,

they just stop reacting.
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How many grips does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to hold it, one to hammer it in.
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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