How many Real Men does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Real Men aren't afraid of the dark.

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A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why?" they asked, as they moved off.

"because," he said "I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."

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Why did the skeleton cross the road?

To get to the body shop.
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How many bikers does it take to change a light bulb?

It takes two. One to change the bulb, and the other to kick the switch.

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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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When is a car not a car?

When it turns into a garage.
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What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?

As far away as possible.

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What is a tornado's favorite game?

Twister!
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I'll tell you what I love doing more than anything: trying to pack myself in a small suitcase.

I can hardly contain myself.

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How did the bubble gum cross the road?

On the bottom of the chicken's foot!

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