How many Real Men does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Real Men aren't afraid of the dark.
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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Where do fortune tellers dance?

At the crystal ball.
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What do vampires take when they are sick?

Coffin drops!
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What do a baker and a millionaire have in common?

They are both rolling in the dough!
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Why did the chicken cross the playground?

To get to the other slide!
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What do you give a lemon in distress?

Lemonade.
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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How many shaggy dogs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Fewer than it takes to screw in a heavy bulb.
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What's the difference between a tick and a lawyer?

The tick falls off when you are dead.
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