How many Real Men does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Real Men aren't afraid of the dark.
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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What kind of cats like to go bowling?

Alley cats.
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How do you wake up Lady Gaga?

You Poke her face.

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo?

The lawyer charges more.
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys?

He was playing by ear

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Why do ducks fly south?

Because it's too far to walk!
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Were does a boat go when it is sick?

To the dock.
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How do you stop a dog barking in the back seat of a car?

Put him in the front seat.
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