How many Real Men does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Real Men aren't afraid of the dark.
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Why did Mozart kill his chickens?

Because they always ran around going "Bach! Bach! Bach!"

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Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle!

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Can you use pink,yellow and green in a sentence?

. The phone went green green, and I pinked it up and said yellow.
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Why was the baseball player arrested in the middle of the game?

He was caught stealing second base.
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How many members of the United Church of Canada does it take to change a light bulb?

How dare you be so intolerant! So what if the light bulb has chosen an alternative light-style?
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What do you call a 400-pound gorilla?

Sir.
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A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself.

The blonde responds to the husband, "Shut up...you're next!"
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What do you call a loony spaceman?

An astronut.
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What is a ghost's favorite pie?

Booberry pie!
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