How many `Real Women' does it take to change a light bulb?

None: A `Real Woman' would have plenty of real men around to do it.
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What did one wall say to the other?

I'll meet you at the corner.
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What did the banana do when the monkey chased it?

The banana split
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What's brown and looks really good on a lawyer?

A Doberman.
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Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.
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What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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How many APL hackers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There's a primitive for that.
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