How many `Real Women' does it take to change a light bulb?

None: A `Real Woman' would have plenty of real men around to do it.
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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.
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How do you cut a wave in half?

Use a sea saw.
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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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How many junkies does it take to change a light bulb?

Oh wow, is it, like, dark, man?
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Why does cheese look sane?

Because everything else on the plate is crackers.
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What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.
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What kind of flower has lips?

Two-lips!
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How does a train sneeze?

Ah-choo-choo!
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