How many `Real Women' does it take to change a light bulb?

None: A `Real Woman' would have plenty of real men around to do it.
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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."
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What's an alligator's favorite drink?

Gator-Ade.
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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper
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How many UFO buffs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. You don't believe me do you? I've got photos! See that big blob? Well, just squint your eyes a bit. . . .
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What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.
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What kind of underwear to reporters wear?

News briefs.
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Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station.
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How many archaeologists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One team, but they'll label every piece of the old one, mark its location in the room, and write a detailed description before determining that it was used to store cornmeal.
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