How many `Real Women' does it take to change a light bulb?

None: A `Real Woman' would have plenty of real men around to do it.
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What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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Where is a rabbit's favorite place to eat?

Ihop
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Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?

It was two tired.
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Do you know how to save a drowning lawyer?

Take your foot off his head.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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What did the candle say to the other candle?

I'm going out tonight!
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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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Why did the tomato blush?

Because he saw the salad dressing!
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