How many `Real Women' does it take to change a light bulb?

None: A `Real Woman' would have plenty of real men around to do it.
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How does Donald Trump plan on deporting 12 million illegal immigrants?

Juan by Juan.
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What goes 99 thump,99 thump,99 thump?

A centipede with a wooden leg.
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What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson?

Get out of my sun!
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What is on the ground and also a hundred feet in the air?

A centipede on its back!
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What kind of math do Snowy Owls like?

Owlgebra
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What do you call a rabbit with beetles all over it?

Bugs Bunny.
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What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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