How many `Real Women' does it take to change a light bulb?

None: A `Real Woman' would have plenty of real men around to do it.
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What did the candle say to the other candle?

I'm going out tonight!
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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What did the clock do after it ate?

It went back four seconds!
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Where do computers go to dance?

The disk-o!
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Why did the orange stop in the middle of the hill?

It ran out of juice!
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What do birds say on Halloween?

Twick o tweet
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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A jump-lead walks into a bar.

The barman says "I'll serve you, but don't start anything"
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