How many `Real Women' does it take to change a light bulb?

None: A `Real Woman' would have plenty of real men around to do it.
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Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?

He got Avogadro's number!
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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Why do you think Civil Disobedience was such a fantastic essay?

Thoreau editing Thorough.
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What music does cheese listen to?

R & Brie.
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How many thought police does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There never was any light bulb.

Notes: Probably the only really good light bulb joke of 1984.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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A man goes to a zoo and discovers there is only one animal and it's a dog.

It was a Shih Tzu
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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