How many `Real Women' does it take to change a light bulb?

None: A `Real Woman' would have plenty of real men around to do it.
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How many Sound Recordists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

WHAT?
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station.
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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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What is a tree's favorite drink?

Root beer.
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Why was the mouse afraid of the water?

Catfish
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