How many `Real Women' does it take to change a light bulb?

None: A `Real Woman' would have plenty of real men around to do it.
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What do Santa's elves drink?

Minnesoda.
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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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"Mommy, everyone says I look like a werewolf."

"Please be quiet and comb your face."
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How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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What lies on its back, one hundred feet in the air?

A dead centipede.
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin!
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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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What do camels use to hide themselves?

Camelflauge
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What music does cheese listen to?

R & Brie.
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