How many `Real Women' does it take to change a light bulb?

None: A `Real Woman' would have plenty of real men around to do it.
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How many professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but they get three tech. reports out of it.
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

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What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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What do you get when you cross a Cocker Spaniel,
a Poodle and a ghost?

A cocker poodle boo.
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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