How many referral agents does it take to change a light bulb?

Two: One to screw you out of a fee, and the other to send you to a store where they ran out of bulbs weeks ago.
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Making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon
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"I said to the Gym instructor "Can you teach me to do the splits?" He said, "How flexible are you?"

I said, "I can't make Tuesdays"

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What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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Where does a polarbear keep its money?

In a snow bank!
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What do you call a wheel made of iron?

A ferrous wheel.
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What is "HIJKLMNO"?

H2O.
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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