How many referral agents does it take to change a light bulb?

Two: One to screw you out of a fee, and the other to send you to a store where they ran out of bulbs weeks ago.
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Three people were in a boat. They all fell off. Only two people ended up with wet hair. Why didn't the other person's hair get wet?

Because he was bald!
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How many engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

First they have to agree on which is better; the analog bulb or a digital bulb.
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What are lawyers good for?

They make used car salesmen look good.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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How do you tell you're kissing a french horn player?

He/She keeps trying to stick their fist up your butt.

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What has holes all over and holds water?

A sponge!
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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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