How many referral agents does it take to change a light bulb?

Two: One to screw you out of a fee, and the other to send you to a store where they ran out of bulbs weeks ago.
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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What does Melania see in Donald Trump?

"Ten billion dollars and high cholesterol!"
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Where would an astronaut park his space ship?

A parking meteor!
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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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I’ve never gone to a gun range before.

I decided to give it a shot!
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Why did New Jersey get all the toxic waste and California all the lawyers?

New Jersey got to pick first.
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Did you hear about Michael Jackson's latest record?

"Feel the World."
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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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