How many referral agents does it take to change a light bulb?

Two: One to screw you out of a fee, and the other to send you to a store where they ran out of bulbs weeks ago.
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What did the picture say to the wall?

I've been framed.
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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"Mommy, everyone says I look like a werewolf."

"Please be quiet and comb your face."
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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What is Donald Trump telling all his supporters?


Orange Is The New Black.
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I'm in great mood tonight because the other day I entered a competition and I won a years supply of Marmite

......... one jar.
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How many Yuppies (WASPs) does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call the electrician, and one to mix the drinks.
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Why doesn't Melania Trump want to be the first lady?

Because she would have to move into a smaller house.
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