How many referral agents does it take to change a light bulb?

Two: One to screw you out of a fee, and the other to send you to a store where they ran out of bulbs weeks ago.
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When is a door not a door?

When it's ajar!
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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What is at the end of everything?

The letter G.
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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Where do horses live?

In the neigh-borhood.
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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?

Because he had no BODY to go with.
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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What has four wheels and flies?

A garbage truck.
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Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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