How many referral agents does it take to change a light bulb?

Two: One to screw you out of a fee, and the other to send you to a store where they ran out of bulbs weeks ago.

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When are kids most likely to go to school?

When the door is open.
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated

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What do you call a movie about Donald Trump, Bernie Madoff, and Kenneth Lay?

The League of Extraordinary Con Men.
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How did the butcher introduce his wife?

Meet Patty.

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There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

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Why did the Blonde stare at the Orange Juice carton?

Because it said CONCENTRATE.
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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear

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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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