How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.
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Why did Mozart kill his chickens?

Because they always ran around going "Bach! Bach! Bach!"

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How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks
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Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in mud, then cross the road again?

He was a dirty double crosser!
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What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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What's the tallest building in the world?

The library, because it has the most stories.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A newspaper!
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What is Donald Trumps favorite song?

ICE ICE Baby......
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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