How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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Where do fortune tellers dance?

At the crystal ball.
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How did the egg cross the road?

It scrambled across!
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What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!
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What has holes all over and holds water?

A sponge!
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What do you call a king who is only 12 inches tall?

A ruler.
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What did the snowman say to the customer?

Have an ice day!
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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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