How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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What did the ghost say to the other ghost?

Do you believe in humans?
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How many cops does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. It turned itself in.
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How does the ocean say hello?

It waves.
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I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite

He said NaBrO
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How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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Went to the corner shop -

bought 4 corners.

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How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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