How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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How many Yuppies (WASPs) does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call the electrician, and one to mix the drinks.
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Making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon
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Which is the most religious cheese?

Emmental...it's very hol(e)y...
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Who says sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me?

A guy who has never been hit with a dictionary.
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How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.
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Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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What do Russians use for napkins?

Soviets
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