How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.
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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin'!
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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What is a cat's favorite movie?

The sound of Mew-sic
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What kind of dessert does a ghost like?

I scream!
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What do moms dress up as on Halloween?

Mummies!
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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?

It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.
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