How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.
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What do you call a girl with a frog on her head?

Lilly.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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What did the ceiling say to the chandelier?

You're the only bright spot in my life.
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What's the only difference between Donald Trump and Bozo the Clown?

Bozo The Clown has real hair on his head.
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What kind of eggs does a wicked chicken lay?

Deviled eggs.
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Where are sharks from?

Finland.
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How many folk singers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."
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