How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.

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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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