How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.

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Trump: "It's not a toupee,

I just found the Bush that Jeb lost."
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What do you get when you cross a witch with sand?

A sandwich!
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What do you call a fake noodle?

An impasta
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What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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Why did the basketball player bring his suitcase to his game?

Because he traveled a lot.
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Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle!

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How many Iraqis does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It doesn't matter, they don't have any electricity any more.
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