How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.

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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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What music does cheese listen to?

R & Brie.
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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Why doesn't Melania Trump want to be the first lady?

Because she would have to move into a smaller house.
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What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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Why can't you compare Donald Trump to cancer?

Because sometimes you can get rid of cancer.
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What do you call a lawyer gone bad.

Senator.
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