How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.

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What did the judge say to the dentist?

Do you swear to pull the tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth?
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Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!
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what do you call a tick on the moon?

A luna-tick
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Where is a rabbit's favorite place to eat?

Ihop
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What element is a girl's future best friend?

Carbon.
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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What's the difference between a snow man and a snow woman?

Snow balls!
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