How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.

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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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What's a royal pardon?

It's what the queen says after she burps.
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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Why did the elephant leave the circus?

He was tired of working for peanuts.
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What has 6 eyes but can't see?

3 blind mice.
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