How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.

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What do you call a fat pumpkin?

A plumpkin.
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What element is a girl's future best friend?

Carbon.
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station.
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How many sound engineers does it take to change a light bulb

None, sound engineers don't do lights
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There was a rooster sitting on a top of a barn. If it laid an egg, which way would it roll?

Roosters don't lay eggs!
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Why was 6 afraid of 7?

Because 7 ate 9.
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