How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.

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How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

100: One to do it and ninety-nine to say "I could've done that."
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How many Wardrobe people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

"Nobody said I needed doubles on that!"
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What did one magnet say to the other?

I find you very attractive.
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What are the 10 letters of the pirate alphabet?

Aye, Aye, Arr and the Seven C's
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Why was the vacationing doctor so mad?

He had no patients.
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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What's in the middle of nowhere?

The letter H.
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