How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.

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How many Cabbage Patch dolls does it take to change a light bulb?

The question is irrelevant, since you couldn't find the dolls even if you knew how many. (Note: Well, this was a good joke in 1983-84. . . .)
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What do you call a cow that plays a musical instrument?

A Moo-sician!

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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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What do you call 25 attorneys buried up to their chins in cement?

Not enough cement.
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Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?

Just in case he got a hole in one!
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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Making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon
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