How many shaggy dogs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Fewer than it takes to screw in a heavy bulb.
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What does cheese like to drink?

Morbier
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How many UFO buffs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. You don't believe me do you? I've got photos! See that big blob? Well, just squint your eyes a bit. . . .
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What does Santa like to do in the garden?

Hoe, hoe, hoe!
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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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Why was 6 afraid of 7?

Because 7 ate 9.
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar.

The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"
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What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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