How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit
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Where do you learn to make banana splits?

In sundae school.
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What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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How many lesbians does it take to change a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and two to talk about how much better it is than with a man.
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How do you get a trombonist off of your porch?

Pay him for the pizza

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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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What's the first thing a musician says at work?

"Would you like fries with that?"

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What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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