How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit
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Now that Macy's has severed ties, with Donald Trump, how can the average American look like the President?

By hunting and killing their own hair piece.
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How is Donald Trump going to create middle class jobs?

By paying them to cheer for him during campaign events.
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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Where would an astronaut park his space ship?

A parking meteor!
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What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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Clowns divorce:

custardy battle.
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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