How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit
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I said to this train driver "I want to go to Paris". He said "Eurostar?"

I said, "I've been on telly but I'm no Dean Martin".
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How many data base people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three:

One to write the light bulb removal program,
one to write the light bulb insertion program, and

one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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The other day I sent my girlfriend a huge pile of snow.

I rang her up, I said "Did you get my drift?".
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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What do you call a clown who's in jail?

A silicon.
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Why did the surfer think the sea was his friend?

Because it gave him a big wave!
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Which candles burn longer, bee's wax or tallow?

Neither, they all burn shorter.
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Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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