How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit
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Why did the skeleton cross the road?

To get to the body shop.
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What does cheese like to drink?

Morbier
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only two, but the hard part is getting them into the light bulb.
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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I bought some shoes off of a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with

but I've been trippin' all day.
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I wouldn't buy anything with velcro.

It's a total rip-off.
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What is a ghost's favorite fruit?

Booberries!
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