How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit

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How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds".

I said, "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".

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What's 182 feet tall and made out of pepperoni and cheese?

The leaning tower of Pizza.
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!

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What is up in the air and wobbles?

A jellycopter
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How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon?

Great food, no atmosphere.
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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