How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit
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How do you get a trumpet to sound like a french horn?

Put your hand in the bell and play a lot of wrong notes.

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What's the definition of a gentleman?

One who knows how to play the saxophone, but doesn't!

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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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How many record producers does it take to change a lightbulb?

Two… one to tell the engineer to do it, the other to say "I don't know, what do you think?"

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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo?

The lawyer charges more.
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How many teenage girls does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One, but she'll be on the phone for five hours telling all her friends about it.
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What's in the middle of nowhere?

The letter H.
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