How many singers from Nashville does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love he is with the new one, and one to go "Yee-Hah!" and throw his cowboy hat in the air.
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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When Susan's boyfriend proposed marriage to her she said: "I love the simple things in life,

but I don't want one of them for my husband".

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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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What kind of cats like to go bowling?

Alley cats.
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What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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