How many singers from Nashville does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love he is with the new one, and one to go "Yee-Hah!" and throw his cowboy hat in the air.
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What is worse then having one baby screaming?

Two babies screaming!
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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What does the winner of the race lose?

His breath.
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If you don't know what introspection is,

you need to take a long, hard look at yourself.
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What does Melania see in Donald Trump?

"Ten billion dollars and high cholesterol!"
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Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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