How many singers from Nashville does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love he is with the new one, and one to go "Yee-Hah!" and throw his cowboy hat in the air.
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How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.
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How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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What is worse then having one baby screaming?

Two babies screaming!
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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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Middle C, E-Flat and G walk into a bar.

Sorry, says the barman, we don't serve minors.
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Red sky at night: shepherd’s delight.

Blue sky at night: day.
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