How many socialists does it take to change a light bulb?

One to petition the Ministry of Light for a bulb, 50 to establish the state production quota, 200 militia to force the factory unions to allow production of the bulb, and one to surreptitiously dial an "800" number to order an American light bulb.
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Why did the chicken cross the playground?

To get to the other slide!
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Where do all the letters sleep?

In the alphabed.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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I went to the doctors the other day and I said, 'Have you got anything for wind?'

So he gave me a kite.

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Why is Superman's costume so tight?

Because he wears a size "S".
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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How many televangelists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. Televangelists screw in motels.
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How many plastic surgeons does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he'll also want to do something about your nose.
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What is the chemical formula for "banana"?

BaNa2
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