How many socialists does it take to change a light bulb?

One to petition the Ministry of Light for a bulb, 50 to establish the state production quota, 200 militia to force the factory unions to allow production of the bulb, and one to surreptitiously dial an "800" number to order an American light bulb.
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What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.
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What is a cat's favorite movie?

The sound of Mew-sic
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What is a cat's favorite breakfast?

Mice krispies
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What is a lion's favorite state?

Maine
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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How many Klingons does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two. One to screw it in, and one to stab the other in the back and take all the credit.
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How many Psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but the bulb has got to really WANT to change.
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How does Donald Trump plan on deporting 12 million illegal immigrants?

Juan by Juan.
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