How many socialists does it take to change a light bulb?

One to petition the Ministry of Light for a bulb, 50 to establish the state production quota, 200 militia to force the factory unions to allow production of the bulb, and one to surreptitiously dial an "800" number to order an American light bulb.
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Why is tennis such a loud game?

Because each player raises a racquet.
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What did the snail say when he got on the turtle's shell?

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Well, first let's talk about the concept behind this whole "light bulb" thing.
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What is on the ground and also a hundred feet in the air?

A centipede on its back!
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What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?

Holly Davidson.
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What kind of pants do ghosts wear?

Boo-Jeans.
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What is a lion's favorite state?

Maine
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What goes tick-tock, bow-wow, tick-tock, bow-wow?

A watch dog.
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What's the difference between a musician and a 14-inch pizza?

A 14-inch pizza can feed a family of four

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