How many socialists does it take to change a light bulb?

One to petition the Ministry of Light for a bulb, 50 to establish the state production quota, 200 militia to force the factory unions to allow production of the bulb, and one to surreptitiously dial an "800" number to order an American light bulb.
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When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!
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What did the baby corn ask the mother corn?

Where is pop corn?
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How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?

Squeaky clean
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Why is b always cool?

Because it's between ac.
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What starts with E, ends with E and only has one letter?

An envelope.
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Why can't Donald Trump be a Lannister?

Because he never pays his debts.
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He made an illegal ewe turn.
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What do sea monsters eat for lunch?

Fish and ships.
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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