How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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Where does a polarbear keep its money?

In a snow bank!
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Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?

It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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Why did the boy take a ladder to school?

He wanted to go to high school!
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Did you hear about Michael Jackson's latest record?

"Feel the World."
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Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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