How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."

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What is a baby's motto?

If at first you don't succeed, cry and cry again!
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What did one titration say to the other?

"Let's meet at the endpoint."
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.

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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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Why do hummingbirds hum?

Because they don't know the words.

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What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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What do you call a clown who's in jail?

A silicon.
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How do you catch a squirrel?

Climb up a tree and act like a nut

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