How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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What do Russians use for napkins?

Soviets
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How many data base people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three:

One to write the light bulb removal program,
one to write the light bulb insertion program, and

one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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Where does a polarbear keep its money?

In a snow bank!
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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A man goes to a zoo and discovers there is only one animal and it's a dog.

It was a Shih Tzu
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What happens when spectroscopists are idle?

They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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Interesting story, the guy who helped me learn algebra never farted around anyone.

I mean he did say he was a private tutor.
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