How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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What's the difference between a tuba and a vacumn cleaner?

You have to turn one of them on before it sucks.

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What did the clock do after it ate?

It went back four seconds!
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Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras
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What does Melania see in Donald Trump?

"Ten billion dollars and high cholesterol!"
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How many referral agents does it take to change a light bulb?

Two: One to screw you out of a fee, and the other to send you to a store where they ran out of bulbs weeks ago.
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How do you fix a broken brass instrument?

With a Tuba glue.

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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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