Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
or
The dentist is taking me out tonight.
or
"Ten billion dollars and high cholesterol!"
or
As far away as possible.
or
The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
or
Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.
or