How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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Middle C, E-Flat and G walk into a bar.

Sorry, says the barman, we don't serve minors.
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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What has a lot of keys but can not open any doors?

A piano.
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What's the difference between a snow man and a snow woman?

Snow balls!
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"I said to the Gym instructor "Can you teach me to do the splits?" He said, "How flexible are you?"

I said, "I can't make Tuesdays"

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How many Real Men does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Real Men aren't afraid of the dark.
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