How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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How do you cut a wave in half?

Use a sea saw.
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Why does a stork stand on one leg?

Because it would fall over if it lifted the other one.
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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What did the boat say to the pier?

What's up, dock?
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What do you get when you cross a Cocker Spaniel,
a Poodle and a ghost?

A cocker poodle boo.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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