How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."

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There were five people under one umbrella. Why didn't they get wet?

It wasn't raining!
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How many running-dog lackeys of the bourgeoisie does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to exploit the proletariat, and one to control the means of production!

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There was a rooster sitting on a top of a barn. If it laid an egg, which way would it roll?

Roosters don't lay eggs!

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Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?

It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.

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What do you call a musician with a college degree?

Night manager at McDonalds

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How many Californians does it take to change a light bulb?

Six. One to turn the bulb, one for support, and four to relate to the experience.

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Do you know how many musicians it takes to change a light bulb?

No, but hum a few bars and I'll fake it.

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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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