How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."

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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.

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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.

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What did the mother broom say to the baby broom?

It's time to go to sweep.

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Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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A small piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner. "Oh Bunsen, my flame," the sodium pined. "I melt whenever I see you,"

The Bunsen burner replied, "It's just a phase you're going through."
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