How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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What did rural America tell Donald Trump?

You're Hired.
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How many technical writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, provided there is a programmer around to explain how to do it.
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What does cheese say to itself in the mirror?

Halloumi.
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What do you call a pig that does karate?

A pork chop.
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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?

Because he had no BODY to go with.
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What's an alligator's favorite drink?

Gator-Ade.
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