How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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Why does Trump love the poorly educated?

Because they only know their ABCs "Anybody But Clinton".
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How many accountants does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What kind of answer did you have in mind?
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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What's the only difference between Donald Trump and Bozo the Clown?

Bozo The Clown has real hair on his head.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"

The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
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Why was the boy sitting on his watch?

Because he wanted to be on time.
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