How many Sound Recordists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

WHAT?

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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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How does Donald Trump intend to spice up the Republican Convention?

By relocating it to a casino!
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Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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What do you call a wheel made of iron?

A ferrous wheel.
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What's worse than a centipede with athlete's foot?

A porcupine with split ends

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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze

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Why is Superman's costume so tight?

Because he wears a size "S".
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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