How many stock brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes (knowing that it's already burned out).
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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck
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The oddly pleasant feeling of looking down on a physist as they drink the last of their beer.

The strange charm of a top down bottoms up.
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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When Susan's boyfriend proposed marriage to her she said: "I love the simple things in life,

but I don't want one of them for my husband".

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Why was the vacationing doctor so mad?

He had no patients.
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How many cats does it takes to screw in a light bulb?

You can throw away your light bulbs. Just douse the cat with gasoline, light it up with a match, and you'll have all the light you need. (Comment: BLEAH!)
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How are doughnuts and golf alike?

They both have a hole in one!
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Where does an elephant pack his luggage?

In his trunk
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