How many stock brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes (knowing that it's already burned out).
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Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle!

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What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.
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What is an astronauts favorite key on the keyboard?

The space bar!
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Why don't they know where Mozart is buried?

Because he's Haydn.

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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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How many ergonomicists does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. Four to decide which way the bulb ought to turn, and . . .
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How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They have machines to do that now.
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What does the toast wear to bed?

Jammies!
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Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?

He got Avogadro's number!
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