How many stock brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes (knowing that it's already burned out).
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Where do you go to find a million story building?

You go to the Library!
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What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.
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What's a royal pardon?

It's what the queen says after she burps.
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What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium
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How many data base people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three:

One to write the light bulb removal program,
one to write the light bulb insertion program, and

one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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Why do loud, obnoxious whistles exist at some factories?

To give us some sort of appreciation for flutes.

Did you hear about that music composer who committed suicide? He didn't even leave a note.

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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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What do you throw to a drowning lawyer?

His partners.
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